Star Wars Captioning #36
....And here we have a nice filet of Ewok....
by Weird Ed Woody
".....and this is all that's left of the Grinch after Boba Fett caught
him trying to steal his cartoon in the "Holiday Special"
by Red Eye Might
Today on Cooking with Braena: Filet of Jar-Jar!
by Adam Goss
Wait a minute - I've seen this before... Isn't that...? Oh. Oh no. Oh
NO. OH GOD!! NOT THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL!! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!
Now you take the Gungan liver and marinate it in its own blood before
grilling it to a forrest green...
"Oh Palpatine Dear, I have your face ready for you to put on."
"You will find a new definition of pain and suffering as this slowly
digests in your belly over a thousand years."
And you thought Darth Maul was scary
by Neno Tutsar
I'm sorry to inform you Mrs Binks but there's been an accident.
by Modern Day Sith
Unknown to most, Prince Xizor's mother had her own Homemaking show on
by Darth Denson
Even the nurse didn't like Jabba at birth
by Fwiffo the Great
(in the voice of Julia Child) "Welcome back to 'Cooking with Mrs.
Palpatine.' Today we are going to make a delightful bantha tounge stew.
Now you have to examine the tounge in the market to......."
by Darth Buzz
And this was my old toupee
"Oompa, loompa, doompity doo..."
No, George. We don't want Star Wars infomercials.
Secretly, the Dartha Stewart show was Sith propaganda, designed to turn
kids to the dark side.
by Darth Tanian
Today on Cooking in Space we explore the wonderfull uses of radioactive
slime in common foods.
by Darth Sillious
I am Harvey Korman, and this is the gooey remains of my career.
by Darth Neilfirstname.lastname@example.org
"George, I made you this wondeful casserole. Please stop denying I exist!!!"
by Darth Deus
Chris Knight's impression of a woman, nothing but RARE!
by Princess Lisa
Princess Lisa, are we implying something about my skill at cooking? That's
it: no Chex mix for you!!! :-)
by Chris Knight
One jab with a pin, and this was all that was left of Jabba
by Steven Cavanagh
In paralytic shock, the alien realized you should never ask a Sith Lord
to "Pull my finger."
by Darth Irid
Today, I'll be demonstrating how to make Jedi flank Polonnaise...
by darth charat
Sarlac Meat. IT IS ALIVE!!! Get it before it gets you.
Somehow, it just looked better in the concept art...
"Good food, yes, good food! Eat, eat!"
Before prepairing wampa entrail soufle' you must tenderize the meat...
Hurry up Beaver! We're having Rhodian steaks for lunch!
by Rouge Null
"Uh...er...W-what's going on? Uhm...Is that a camera? Oh, by the Force,
don't tell me you're Alan Funt..."
Photo of Mace Windu from "To Wong Fett--Thanks for Everything, Jabba
by Exar Kun
I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too...
"She who controls Arrakis, controls the Spice...She who controls the
Spice, controls the Universe...She who controls the Universe, controls
this slab of Meat! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
"Now then sonny boy, set your little green behind down in yer chair and
finish breakfast, you can destroy the Sith when yer done, Yoda!" (home
cookin always was a factor in Yoda's green and stumpiness
by Silvia Solo Godess of Corellia
"-And then we add a Gungan ear into the soup..."
by Dead Star
Hi and welcome to QVC Home Shopping. Our next item is a bare flannel
used by Wuher himself , we had reports this was used to clean up Greedo
but we dont know , who cares we are almost giving this away !
by The mighty wookie Gary
Aunt Jar-Jar Mima serves up her famous Roast Ewok.
A young Jabba and his nurse maid
by Daren Rogers
An experiment at the cloning facility went horribly wrong as Queen Amidala
and Louise Jefferson were fused together.
by Mildly Funny Star Wars Fan
Drugs are bad, even in a Star Wars movie.
Have some more sloppy joes! I know how you kids like 'em extra sloppy!
I'll be back some day you just wait till the Star Wars Christmas Special
Prequel......me and this Wookiee lung I'm holding we will back back mark
by jabba in the hut
We sure ain't got no mad cow disease around here?
by catel tiphaine
An early episode of the huge flop, "How to cure a Wookie pelt" starring
While Mr. Calrissian had had high hopes, something had gone terribly
wrong in the cloning process.
"And today on Cooking with Martha Fett, how to make Ewok stew."
How the Grinch stole Star Wars Captioning #36
by Jared Fett
Its a Girl!
Lucas takes the commercialism WAY too far in Episode II....
by Matt Lush
Living proof that yes, it is indeed possible to mess up making Jell-O.
by Darth Sethor
What the Hell? How does this need a caption? It is funny enough as is.
by Kelther Topom
Little Debbie has gone to the Dark Side!
"And now we have... what the hell is that?"
Tenderize your Slug, then bake on 350 for about 60 minutes.
by Judd-I Nighty night
After an Ovaltine overdose George Lucas exploded in front of the costume
designer for episode 2
Subsequent to the Carol Burnet show, Harvey Korman became a cross dressing
canible. He holds in his hands the remains of Tim Conway.
by Richard the Idiot
I'm not quite sure the "road kill" Jello mold will catch on...
All hell broke loose after TF.N released a completely obscure picture
in the caption competion, people were still cleaning up hours later
And now, after adding the pepper, we place it lightly in....SWEET MOTHER
OF THE FORCE!!!!!! WHAT THE HECK IS THIS STUFF?!?! I WANT MY LAWYER!!!!
by Darth Fruitcake
Coming soon to CBS, The Jeffersons 3000.
Some people wandered what became of Boba Fett and if he escaped.....
by Govie wan
Get your taun-taun steaks now! Red hot of the holonet! Now we finally
guarantee you will be able to enjoy the fine foodstuffs the rebels ate
by Jedi Kirla Jawes
Some grandmothers just TALK about their surgery, but mine had visual
aids. I didn't have many friends.
by JS Power
Welcome to Roadkill Cafe, sweetie. What can I get ya?
And today on "How to Cook Gungans" with your host...
by Mageeia, Dark lady of the Sith
George Lucas wanted to add something very special to the DVD version
of Episode One: Cooking with Momma Xizor
The Star Wars Cooking Show, for some reason, never really got off the
ground... couldn't have had anything to do with the fact that bantha meat
is hard to find at Family Fare...
by The Real Viola
"Now you take the yoda and put it in the pot to cook for 15 mintues and
you got a wonderful dinner," said Darth Vader's personal cook.
The real reason Anakin turned to the dark side: His mother imitated Edith
by Mr. Happypants
The Skywalkers sent us a really funky-looking fruitcake.
by Rebel Against the Clinton Empire
What does this even have to do with Star Wars? We May never know...
by Darth Mall
The real reason why the Ooompa Lumpa's decided to work at the chocolate
factory: Mom's bad cookin'
After many years, we finally are shown a Nerf
by Darth Firefly
And that's how to make Jawa gut steak. Thanks for tuning in to cooking
with Green Granny. Next time we will be making stuffed Wookiee.
As a child, Palpatine would often upset his housekeeper by leaving the
weasels he'd practised his Sith choke on lying around the house.
by Emperor Palpatim
"Mr. Knight? I'm sorry, but there's nothing more we can do: your soufflee
is beyond repair"
by Chris Knight
Then we dip the Nar Shadda Chicken in the sauce like so...
by Jonathan Higdon
"And here we have a sample of a Gungan gibblet. . .very good with a gentle
red wine sauce. . ."
~*Little did the Coruscant High School students know that the cafeteria
lady was REALLY serving Bantha liver...*~
by Darth Fruitcake
Hi, I'm looking for Ackbar, he forgot his lunch.
....then you take the slug and put it in the oven for 30 minutes. Remember,
just 30, you don't want to dry it out and lose all that juicy flavor!
"And today on Granny's Kitchen we'll learn how to sautee fresh...what
ever this snake looking stuff is..."
Tell Obi-wan I'm really sorry for running over Yoda
by Ice Jedi
BIG NEWS!: Episode II will be ALL this! 2 hours of this lady cooking
by Jedi Bib
"Scientists finally discover what stunted Master Yoda's growth: his mother's
by Jadu Vezet
Submitted for your approval: a once-normal hosewife falling in with the
wrong crowd. Little did she know of the dark secrets in the underbelly
by DarthWedge:A new Darth,For a New Century
Princess Leia meets Mrs. Buttersworth
by Miana Kenobi
What!? Flock of Seagulls is in the Star Wars universe? IS THERE NO ESCAPE!?
In a desperate last attempt to discover the location of the Rebel Base,
Lunch Lady Tarkin pulls out the "Bantha Meat Surprise."
by Six Madine
Darth Cookie was rejected early for the villian of Episode II
Inside the Sarlacc Pit
by Tie Guy
...the Yoda Placenta has been kept super-cooled for 300 years. This is
a rare treat.
Soylent Squid is people...it's PEOPLE!
$20 to whoever swallows this uh... thing whole!!
by Mr. Qui-Gon
Mamma Windu, making her notorious "Magical Brownies"
by Katy Farry
Surprise! Dewback liver for supper.
"After you dry out the Hutt, dip it in a light marinara for about an
by Chad Evans
...next we take the bantha bladder and stick it in the oven...
by The Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
Oh, that's what you meant when you said you were having Wicket for dinner.
by Darth Tanian
The new Sith aprentice Darth Aunt May
by Owen (not a handle my actual name)
And the next step in our tenderizing is***We are sorry to inform you
that the TFN web address has crashed after being bombarded with corny
cooking show jokes...
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