Action Figure Emporium - Captioning #4
The Empire's third Death Star budget looked pretty good on paper. At least
until Vader realized, all to late, that it was in Canadian dollars.
by Evan Burr
AAaaaahhhh! Those idiots! I told them specifically: " Cold wash, machine dry!"
Honey,I shrunk the death star!
by Jediforce a.k.a. q2
"And, as you can see, my Master, your throne tower will be on the top, and the only tiny flaw will be a small port near the big circle-thingy!"
It looked bigger on TV.
by Mark Anthony
"Now HOW are we going to fit 20,000,000 Stormtroopers in this.....?"
Aw crap! I knew using that ultra-growth formula would come back to haunt me.
...and if you run finger CLOCKWISE down the trech it goes into massage AND uses heating pads
by Exar Kun
The result of cuts in the Imperial defense budget: the "economy-sized" Death Star III.
Vader: "Didn't you idiots read the note at the bottom of the blueprints? 1/10,000 scale!!!"
by Bob Vader
"Don't be so proud of this technological toy you've created...it is nothing next to the new Galoob Millenium Falcon!"
by Sith Lord Vader
Vader on QVC..."Now you, too, can own your own Death Star! This beautifully handcrafted silver-plated version is one millionth of the original size, but has all the firing power of the original!
"let's see them fly an X-wing into this one. HAHAHAHA!
by Dan Warren
Hey good-look'n would you like to ride on my Deathstar
Disco Darth w/h Shiny Disco Death Star Disco Ball
by Gavin Parker
"No, no, no. First *I* got hit by the Enlarging Ray, and then the Death Star got hit by the Super Shrinking Ray, and then I got, no wait, then Yak Face... oh forget it. Just get us back to normal.
by Super Oogie
It's big, I guess, but It was supposed to be huge. Oooh. How am i gonna blow stuff up now!
"So you see Emporer, all we have to do is get Gallop to make micro-machine action figures to man this station, then we will rule the toy market by fear itself."
by Walter Danek
Little known trivia: Darth Vader earned extra money as a stunt double for Harrison Ford in Raiders of the Lost Ark. By doing so, and working nights as a bouncer, he put himself through Sith school.
"Ha, ha, you're insignificant compared to the power of the Force!!!"
"We bankrupted entire systems for THAT?!!"
by Glitch in the System
And as you can see, this Economy-sized Death Star is easy to store...What? No, It's not full strength...Oh, I'd say a Corellian Corvette. It's a steal for only 3,000 credits. No? Well over here is our
by Dart Bader
Do not be too proud of this technological terror you've created. Its power is insignificant next to the power of.. ME!
by Ryan Dawson
The Star Wars 1999 Christmas Special (still in production) will feature an Imperial march unlike any other with Hozzel's tapdance and a Vader/Death Star duet who both happen to sound like Puff Daddy
by Andrey Summers
This is our new compact Death Star design. It's smaller size enables us to sneek up on the Rebels. However we need 60,000 of them to do any damage and it is not shielded.
Trust me, gentlemen... to the rebels, it'll look enormous!
"Hmmmm, it looked a lot bigger in the catalog."
HEY LADIES! Check out my giant Death Star disco ball!
by Alex Tib
I paid how much for this peice of crap?
by Josh McNeil
Size matters not.
by Marisa Vitale
"OKAY! Who put my Death Star in the cold wash??"
... and suddenly thirteen clowns poured forth from the third Death Star and destroyed Coruscant with cream pies and seltzer bottles.
by D. Sigley
I'm accepting this award tonite for Moff Tarkin who couldn't be here.........
"Plus, if you act now, when you buy your own personal Death Star, you get a Dark Lord of the Sith absolutely free! Now how much would you pay?"
by Jeff Evans
That's no moon, its a soccer ball!
The bright side is that this can be easily blamed on the metric system.
Emporium Captioning Archive: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12