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"If the saber is not lit, you must acquit!" declared defense attorney
J'onzee Cokrax during closing arguments of what has become the most-watched
trial in galactic history.
Less than four hours later, a diverse jury consisting of two male humans,
one female wookiee, three zabraks, a dalek (gender unknown) and five others
of race indeterminable, found Jedi Master Yoda innocent in the the
shooting of convenience store clerk Mosh Anditovu. Following the incident,
Yoda led law enforcement officials in a
widely-watched "White Bantha" chase as they arrived to question
him further. Yoda was
later arrested and never hesitated to claim innocence in the incident. Mosh
spent two days in a bacta tank recovering from gunshot injuries.
It was the weapon involved that Cokrax made an especially vehement argument
in defending his client: "Do Jedi use guns? Ladies and gentlemen and things
of the jury, they do not. Firearms are clumsy to them, and too random. Jedi
use lightsabers. If they ever rob a convenience store, they'll at least be elegant
Following Cockrax, Marshahawnic made closing arguments for the prosecution,
but conceded later that without sufficient midi-chlorian evidence, their case
District judicial droid IT-0 gave final instructions to the jury, then
sequestered them. Three hours later the twelve jurors filed back into the courtroom
to deliver the verdict of "not guilty."
Yoda was released from custody and returned to the Jedi Temple, where
a celebration commenced. The jurors were released from their duties. None spoke
to members of the press, particularly after Wookiee juror Nalakala ripped the
leg off a United Press Galactic reporter.
Filed By Mott Dug
Reports are moved when circumstances warrant
http://www.theforce.net for updates
(c)DUG'S REPORT 1138