Prophets Of The Dark Side
by Paul Davids and Hollace Davids
Published by Bantam Publishing
Scott's Rating: 1 out of 4
This is the sixth and final book in this children's series. (Thank the Maker!) Triclops, the three eyed son of Palpatine, has a spy transmitter implanted in his tooth. For some reason, it can only be removed with chemicals from a rare mushroom. Go figure. Luke, Ken, and the gang go to a dangerous planet to get the mushroom. However, Luke and Ken are immediately, and easily, captured by stormtroopers and taken to the Prophets of the Dark Side. They force Ken to take them to the underground city of the Jedi on Yavin. However, Luke and the gang outsmart them and escape, leaving the prophets trapped in the City for who knows how long. In the end, Ken discovers that Triclops is his father (thus Palpatine's grandson) and Han and Leia get married in the temple on Yavin.
As usual, Drew Struzan does a great cover. Unfortunately, his tremendous talent was wasted on this project. I also have to give the Davids a thumbs up for attempting to explore the marriage of Han and Leia and getting into the possibility of Palpatine having heirs and Dark Side Prophets. However, I give them a huge thumbs down for screwing it up. Read on.
I don't know who at Lucasfilm approved this series, but they need to be dragged to the Sarlaac and thrown in. This series gives new meaning to the word "awful". They reduced Han and Leia's relationship to the equivalent of a goofy teen romance. They turned Leia into a giggly teenager. They made the Emperor's son a three eyed idiot that babbled superweapon secrets in his sleep. They made the potentially cool Prophets of the Dark Side a dwarf spouting poetry in a sparkly robe. They reduced Luke into a Jedi WHIMP. They tried to get preachy with pseudo-environmental themes. Every other thing in the books has an acronym: SPIN, TNT, DRAPAC, etc. The dialogue was rotten, the plot weak, and the stories predictable. You could fall back and say that this is simply a children's book, but I can point to many other children's books that are not only faithful to the films and characters, but are GOOD entertaining stories for all ages. This series, I would say, was a sad attempt at raking in more dough for the franchise. Thankfully, most of the other Star Wars novels have wiped out this continuity and we'll hopefully never see them again.
Grand Moff Hissa being boiled alive and killed in lava. Hey, wasn't he half eaten by acid in another book?