A VISIT TO THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE
Imagine you took a visit to the Star Wars Universe. What kinds of things would you see?
Well, Rimrunner, Badger, and Davin Felth on the RASSM Newsgroup thought of some pretty cool
BUMPER STICKERS you might see!
My Jedi brat can beat up your honors student"
"I survived the Battle of Endor"
"Palpatine, save me from your followers"
"My other starship is an SSD"
"Visit scenic Beggars Canyon"
"Jedi Master on board -- please fly carefully"
"Support your local stormtrooper -- buy Imperial"
"Max Rebo Tour '97 [or whatever year it is]"
"X-wing pilots do it better"
"WE BRAKE FOR NOBODY" (on the Star Destroyer's rear, silly) why yes, I did see that movie,
why do you ask?
"My other vehicle is an AT-AT"
"Palpatine/Vader in 2000 (Like you have a choice)"
"If you don't like the way I fly, stay out of the asteroid field"
"The only way they'll get my blaster is if they pry it from my cold, dead hands"
"I brake for Wookies (But not for Ewoks)"
"Don't follow me - my hyperdrive is disabled"
"Graduate of the Han Solo School of Asteroid Belt Navigation"
"Graduate of the Darth Vader School of Personnel Management"
"Yoda School of Grammar Graduate, I Am!"
"Baby Ewok on Board"
"Jedi Academy Honor Student on Board"
"Don't Like the Way I Drive? Call 1-800-FLY-CASUAL"
"My Other Car is an Incom T-16"
"Member of Stormtroopers Local 1138"
"Mon Mothma for Emperor!"
Badger took this speculation to the next level and asked,
"What would T-Shirts say in the Star Wars Universe?"
"My Mom (and/or Dad) fought at the Battle of (Yavin/Hoth/Endor) and all I got was this lousy T-shirt"
"Have you hugged a wookie today?"
"I'm with stupid" (With arrow pointing to Jabba)
"My Astromech went to the Death Star and all I got were the lousy Technical Schematics"
"Emperor's slugs need love too"
Then K. Howe thought of the following T-Shirt:
"My sister went to the galaxy class tour of the Death Star, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt!"
So what would this Death Star Tour be like? Well, K. Howe thought of the perfect tour
she'd like to go on there and in the Star Wars Universe!
"I personally would like the Galaxy Class (as in world class, not Trek) tour of the Death Star
(before destruction). Of course, I would want a tour of the first one. In the gift shop I would
like to pick up one of those mini-Death Stars (fully operational, of course. I have a few
oranges to take care of!). A couple of post cards (of course): one of Grand Moff Tarkin and
Vader cheesing it up for the camera (of course, i'd have to assume Vader's cheesing).
And I can't forget the "My sister went to the Galaxy Class tour of the Death Star, and all I got
was this lousy T-shirt" for my brother. The tour would include such features as the docking bay,
ocassional outgassing and complete access to the briefing room and detention blocks. If there
are any prisoners aboard, visitors are allowed to question them with a probe droid. If there
aren't, visitors can pretend they are a prisoners, and their friends, family and
travelling companions can question them."
"If, for some reason the Death Star wasn't available, I would want to go to Endor for some big
Ewok hunting. I would bring back any Ewok pelts that I managed to bring down (but I refuse to
drink Ewok blood. I have to draw the line somewhere)."