Lando: "So then I said, 'Listen, Vader, if you don't return Han to me in the next five seconds, you're a deadman.' But he ran away before I could get'im. Honest."
by Ajent Orenj
Ok, so a smuggler, a wookie, and a scoundrel walk into a bar...
by Ajent Orenj
"Wait. you're gonna do commercials for what? Some sort of alcoholic malt beverage? Sweet!"
by grob
"Hey, see those 2 guys behind you? No, don't look. I think they're talking about your Wookie."
by grob
"Do you give him an egg with his food, 'cuz his coat is so shiny."
by grob
Han: "You talkin' to me? Are you talkin' to ME?!? Well, you must be talkin' to me, cuz I don't see anyone else here. Except for the wookie, the two guys behind me, the droid... I'll start over."
by Ajent Orenj
Well after reading the recent updates, I guess everyone is gonna try to get a chain submission posted.
by Ajent Orenj
Like that's original.
by Ajent Orenj
Those bastards!
by Ajent Orenj
Stealing a perfect idea and trying to pass it off as their own.
by Ajent Orenj
Like anybody would actually buy that.
by Ajent Orenj
What a load of crap.
by Ajent Orenj
Makes me sick.
by Ajent Orenj
Ah well.
by Ajent Orenj
What
by Ajent Orenj
can
by Ajent Orenj
you
by Ajent Orenj
do?
by Ajent Orenj
How was I supposed to know she was your Mother?
by Mike_Droideka
You're welcome.
by the guys who just beat up Ajent Orenj
The satellite dish? Nien Nunb was flying! Its not my fault!!!!
by FTW
Han: "Sorry, buddy, I just talked to George... We're not in Episode III either." Lando: "Damnit! Jar Jar's getting three episodes... Why can't I? Is that too much to ask?!"
by New Age Raven
Cmon Chewie! Just push a little more! Han...hold his hand will ya!
by Anthony Schiavino
Just give my back my Colt 45 and the wookie lives...
by FTW
Lando: "No no, you have to haggle. I say, 'Fifteen credits.' and then you say, 'Fifteen credits? You must be mad!' Got it?"
by Ajent Orenj
Lando: "There! See, the quarter is gone! Now, Han, check your left pocket..."
by MoronDude
What?! He asked if the fur made him look fat....
by Corran Horn
Gimme paw!
by Cirrocco
Lando had the gift of gab, entrancing Han and Chewie with another tall tale...
by Cirrocco
Something I've always wondered... How early is EARLY?
by New Age Raven
"But Han, Colt 45s are so much better than blasters..."
by Keith
After the Battle of Endor, Han takes Lando to task for spilling beer on the Millenium Falcon's seats.
by Keith
The crowd swapped stories while DJ 1TwoB layed down dope science in the background...
by Cirrocco
Lando: "No, man, the yellow stripe is really..... um...... masculine."
by Ajent Orenj
Lando tells of his daring escape from the Video Games section, much to the disbelief of Han and Chewie.
by Jedi Master Jeremy
With no sabbac deck in sight and boredom sinking in, this small band of scoundrels gathers between scenes for a staring contest. The loser must go with Chewie to a wookie karaoke bar.
by Inebriated Wyrm
Han " So uh... Want to explain what happend to my dish on the Falcon, Lando!?" "Chewie and I arn't picking up HBO anymore."
by Nota
Now, Solo... blue pill... or red pill ? Look around you. Droids, humanoid bears... what *IS* real ?
by FSFTF
Is Chewie growing horns or what ?
by Wedge The Fridge
"I once caught a rabbit thiiiiiiis biiiiiiiig."
by Chad Evans
"Excuse me? 'Boom da gassa?' Who wrote that line? It will NEVER work."
by Chad Evans
"I don't care what you say Lando. There is NO invisible bantha there so fess up!"
by Chad Evans
Han: "Does this belt make my ass look big?" - - - Lando: "What would you have me say?"
by Ajent Orenj
What!?
by Qui-Gon Tom
"...So I took Chewie's advice and ripped her arms off!"
by DemuliX
"What!?? I thought you were seein' that leia chick, so i figgered chewie was on the market!"
by Qui-Gon Tom
"... and so I took Chewie's advice and ripped her arms off!"
by DemuliX
thats right...immac works wonders Chewwie..i was once a hairy ol' wookie like you untill i discovered it...now i look like an every day human
by Rickie
what are you looking at??? this...this is nothing...just a small evil ring nothing to worry about....really
by jedi gal
i't may interest you to know that i have a mole on my face...i know it's ironic that i myself am a Mole
by Austin chick
Droid in background: "This would've been entertaining if I were physically capable of spitting in their drinks."
by Ajent Orenj
Chewie!! Han!! I had no idea you guys get your massages here, too!!
by Evil the Cat
The thing Lando hated most of all about living in a small town was that no matter where you went, you wound up running into people you didn't want to talk to
by Evil the Cat
Lando: "So where's Luke? There's a huge gap right in the middle of this shot. Balance is way off, man."
by Ajent Orenj
"He said 'I want your cape'. And I hate to bring this up again, but it's not wise to upset a wookiee."
by Evil the Cat
The Best LIttle Whorehouse in Bespin
by Evil the Cat
OK, Han, itps your birthday, so pick a girl and I'll treat...just try not to be as "random or clumsy as a blaster", if you get my drift...
by Evil the Cat
Lando: "I'm gonna need it? I'M GONNA NEED IT?!? What the #@&% is THAT supposed to mean?!?!?"
by Ajent Orenj
Si, Senor, dis one is fully house-trained...still, choo may wanna put down some papers for de first week or so.
by Evil the Cat
Lando: "Hey, you wanna start something?" - - - Han: "Me? No, I don't get physical. I just get upset. And when I get upset,
HAN!! Man, it's been YEARS....ummm...this must be your lovely...uh...I gotta run...
Dude, you've had that cat since college, and I SWEAR it gets bigger and bigger every time I see it.
Lando: "You've got to believe me! I swear to you the last alien I dated had breasts right down to here!" Han: "C'mon. You've been downing too many Colt 45's, haven't you?"
Excuse me...I'm Disco Lando, and I was hoping one of you fine foxy ladies might wanna join me for a WHHOOOAAAHHHH, sorry, my mistake...
[Lando to Han] -- Where did you get your big walking carpet?
(L) "Lend you $5? I'd just as soon kiss a wookiee!" (H) "I can arrange that..."
[Lando to Han] -- Where did you get your big walking carpet?
"There seem to be an awful lotta GUYS at this club, Lando..."
(L) "OK, now remember the routine...when the ladies ask, I'm the head of a successful mining colony, and you're the scoundrel old pirate." (H) "Yeah...you're a real hero..."
When Han and Lando started off on their "who's Hotter, Barbarella or Trixie from Speed Racer", Chewie could do little more than sit and stare in disbelief.
Han: Look, dude. You DO NOT want to piss off a wookie when he's having a bad hair day.
Unfortunatly, even with the re-re-rerelease, the rarely seen Chewbacca, Han, and Lando love triangle scene may never see the light of day.
and ths fish I caught was THIS big!
"But Han, Pantene Pro-Vitamin (tm) ALWAYS works for me, when I'm having a bad hair day!"
"Look, Han, old buddy--I'm just saying, if you want to shampoo a Wookie, you just *have* to use conditioner afterwards! Just look at his fur! Dull, lifeless, matted....no offense, Chewie..."
"So I forgot to bring the keg of Colt 45 malt liquor! So what?! It's just a commercial!"
"What do you mean, you forgot Leia's ring?" "I mean, I forgot Leia's ring. Don't worry, Han, buddy! I'm sure she won't notice." "She won't notice? She's a PRINCESS! She sleeps in a tiara!"
Lando: "Hey, wait a second--what are those two guys in the back talking about?"
Once again, Chewie, bored out of his furry skull as the Humans jabber on and on with their war plans, contemplates what life would be like if he'd been born with the dancing skills of Fred Astaire...
Lando: "All I'm saying is, do *you* guys have anything better planned for Saturday night than blowing up the second Death Star? Come on! The babes will be all over us, afterwards!"
"Whaddya mean, I only wear this cape because I'm worried everyone will make fun of my butt?"
Lando: "Hey, Han, watch me pull a rabbit out of my sleeve!" Han: "Again??"
Lando: "And now for something completely different: A Wookie with three buttocks..."
Lando: "...And then this old man, who's guarding a bridge across a chasm, asks me not only what my favorite color is, but what the velocity of a laden swallow might be!" Han: "African or European?"
Look Lando, for the last time, I did not drink the last Colt 45 !!!
Why are they in the bathroom?
The real reason Lando lost the falcon? He wouldn't replace the jacuzzi with Chewie's personal toilet.
Emher
Lando: "Yessssss! paper! take that chewie and your stupid Rock!"
"So I told him, that is no gungan, that is my wife!"
This is an obvious blatant attempt to steal people away from TFN games by using lando in a caption.
Lando: ''You mean he's not a walking blanket!''
Lando: A wookie, a hobbit, and muppet walk into a bar...
Lando: It's simple...cheese.
You mean this time they've actually made it DIFFICULT to blow up the Death Star?
Han: Sorry, Lando. You can't borrow the Falcon to lead an attack on the new Death Star. I gotta get Chewie here back to his family in time to celebrate something called 'Life Day.' You wanna come?
Lando: "What, is the cape too much? No one else is wearing a cape."
Taking a break from his regular gig over at Video Games, Lando visits some old friends in the Humor section.
LANDO: Hold on, I know I said she wouldn't get a scratch and I meant it...we just sorta lost the satellite dish in there somewhere...
::flash back to Thumb Wars:: uuuugghhh Crunchy
Han: "You blinked! You blinked!"
Lando: Hey Han, i'll show you a trick, just wait. Uhm....wait.....ahm....and voila, your keys for the Falcon are gone ! Han: Wow, i'm impressed. Chewie: *grunt*
Lando: Hey what are you staring at ? Han: Well I'm just looking at that amazing stain on your shirt. Chewie: *grunt*
Lando: Hey, it was just a fart. Everybody does that. Han: Yeah, but now I seem to know what your real job was on Bespin. They fill up blasters with your gas, don't they ?
Han: You call that a fart ?
Lando-I don't know where your keys are!!!
Lando: I'm telling you the fish was this big! Han: You're kidding right? Lando: No, he got away to the little bugger
Lando: "No further questions, your honor. Your witness..." Han: "Who you callin' witless?"
Lando: "Never try to cop a feel from an Ewok, just take it from me!" Han: "Oh... uh... okay..." Lando: "The advice, you idiot, not the feel!"
No honstly, I'm telling ya guys it was this big
Lando: "So is it true what they say about Wookiees? You know..." Han: "... They have big hands?"
No sorry Lando, Chewie and I just don't see the Fonzie resemblance...
"Han, I really diddnt fart"
Dude I don't know... Do you really need a caption? I mean, just the look on his face is so...never mind!
Hey you guys...how bout a Colt 45
And then i said, turn your head and cough
...And when you prchase the washing machine, you get this walking mop free!
The ORIGINAL Billy Dee Williams Colt 45 ad.
Solo:"What do ya mean you forgot the Colt 45?!? Man, this party blows!"
I don't know what happened, Han, all of a sudden the captions were being updated!
Lando: Han - it was this big!!! I am NOT going to clean his litterbox any more!
No, really, they're THIS BIG.
OK, who took my COLT 45?
Hey Chewie, betcha he ends up in commercials.
Solo:"Seriously, there's like no chicks here either!"
A Smuggler, a Gambler and a Wookie walk into a bar...
(Kirk voice) "Doctor, the tribbles have invaded our ship!" (Doctor voice) "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor not a veterenarian!"
"You know Han, If we take Chewie with us, we won't need to bring a mop."
"No, I didn't know Colt 45 beer grew hair like that, but on Leia, its an improvement."
Lando: ...And im like, THATS WHAT SHE SAID!!! Han and Chewie"I dont get it"
"Yeeeeaaaah, So I notice that you've been having trouble with your T.P.S. report, I'll just send you the memo about adding a cover sheet with your T.P.S report."
Its not my fault, you potty trained him you wipe him.
LANDO: "A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut!" HAN: "I'm not interested! Will you go tell Mon Mothma that General Solo is here?" CHEWIE: "It could be carried by an African swallow!"
$5 dollars for the walking carpet here, out the door!
Honestly, it was THIS big
Lando: HAN! Your seeing a WOOKIE??? I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!
LANDO: "Han, I....uhhhh....I forgot to fix the Falcon after destroying the Death Star." HAN: "You did WHAT?!??!!"
"Would you like to buy one of these fine leather jackets?"
"Sorry about the betrayal and all, can't we just go back to being friends?"
"Hey chewie, how much to buy your Han Solo?"
"So anyway George decided it would be a good idea if I was the kid that was Anakin's best friend! Man as he didn't punish me enough with the outfit!"
"So she said "Is that a lightsaber in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?" Phzzwing!"
Oh, great, now Lando took over the Humor section as well!
"Ready for the song and dance routine?" Ultimate Edition Feature.
"Where's the bathroom?"
Look Han, I'm sorry!!! If I knew he wasn't a pet I never would have tried to pet him.
"Sorry Chewie, I thought you were a big comfy chair"
"Don't look now but I think we're being watched"
"A Wookie, a Smuggler and a Mining Colony Leader walk into a bar..."
"The Headset guy, yeah he's like my personal slave or something!"
"No seriously, the TFN Humour editor updated on time AGAIN!"
Lando: Come on, Han. You swore to me that he was housebroken.
Man in Back: Hehehe... I've always wanted to pounce on Han Solo
"Well he said it was his Lightsaber but I don't know..."
Is anyone else wondering why a medical driod is sitting in on the "lets attack the second death star" planning meeting?
I swear I told them to stock the Falcon with enough Colt 45 for the trip. I can't help it that Chewie is a lush.
Han: "You want me to invest How Much ?!" Lando: "Come on it's a sure thing. Everyone wants to see another Holiday Special.....Tell him Chewie.
Lando: "So I told Wedge, you can't possibly have an Ewok as a pilot. Did he believe me? Nooooo...."
Han: Ok, I'll give you this nice wookie specimen for 300$. Lando: Can we talk 20$ 200 is way to expensive for whats gonna be a carpet.
"I'm telling you Han, Amyway is the wave of the future!!!" Han, "Amway, hmmmm."
Lando: So sue me. How was I supposed to know he'd get fleas the day after you left?
At Chewie's funreal we all of a sudden realize that he's not dead SWEAT!!!!!!
Have you seen my puppy? She's about this big, I can't find her anywhere!
An idle medical droid wonders how long it would take to shave a wookiee...
Hey, I took care of him while you were away, I get to keep him.
I swear Han, I just gave him a little Colt 45! I didn't know Luke would grow hair all over his body.
Hey, lego my Eggo!
What, you get the Falcon AND the Wookie? No deal.
"Look, it had to be Chewy! No one can cough up a hairball this big!"
Well, I think it's up to Chewie to decide which parent he stays with. .
Lando- "Look, I haven't seen your belt! You're just gonna have to hold your pants up Han!"
"Look Han. The left hand is bigger than the right."
The notorious C.H.E.W.Y. music video
*Wookie groar* Han translating: "look here pal, 10 for the lap dance,he will pay no more than 10"
...WHAT THE HELL IS THE MEDICAL DROID FROM ESB DOING BEHIND A DESK DURING A REBEL MEETING?!
Lando, "Then I said, 'Pull my finger'. It was great,, I just wish I could have seen Vader's face.
What do you mean, there are Eints on Endor? What's an Eint?
"THIS is the date you wanted to set me up with?!?"
So I says to the guy.....
"Don't give me that look. The cape-thing worked for Vader, why can't it work for me?"
Silence filled the room, and then Lando realized he shouldn'tve started the joke with, "A smuggler & a Wookie walk into a bar..."
Han: Do you know the Muffin Man? Lando: The Muffin Man? Han: The Muffin Man. Chewie: *rips them apart for annoying Shrek reference.*
Chewie: Look guys, don't fight over a toilet ok? I say whoever is crazy enough to go in after a Wookie deserves to use it. Now gimme a second to finish. . .
"No gel? NO GEL? We've been planning Chewy's makeover for weeks and NOW you tell me there's NO GEL?!?"
Lando: "What? You mean you didn't have ANY CLUE that Leia knew she was making-out with her brother?"
Lando: "Have either of you seen my 40 oz?"
"Geez, Harrison - just because these caption contests suddenly make me popular is no reason for you to get all pissy! For the first time in over twenty years, people finally realize I exist!"
Lando: "Shh... Guys, dont turn around right now, but isn't that Dave Mathews behind you?"
"So then Jabba says 'Death....by MowMow....' "
"Whaddaya mean Chewy dumped the spice at the first sight of an Imperial starcruiser?!? Well, we can't blame him - he's the new guy. Han: you're taking the rap for this one."
Ah! Goose!
Lando: "... and I said to the guy, 'You're going to do WHAT with that womp-rat?"
Lando: "... Han, Chewie. Getting married by this droid isn't going to help ANYBODY."
Lando: "Is it just me, or is anyone else really bugged-out by this guys glowing eyes?."
Come on buddy, I didn't know Jabba was using you as a dart board...
Lando: Han, remember the time I told you that story about how I cheated a 2-1-B droid out of 1000 credits? Well I need to get off-planet as quickly as possible.
"...and the catch was THIS BIG..."
Thats a good obvious pun I think
"Okay, we play like Whose Line... one of us has to be sitting, another has to have his arms on his hips, and the other has to..."
Nothing I ever say makes sense for these things, so...
FLEEBNORK!
MONSOBEDEY!
EPISODE 1!
Let's try a real one...
Lando: "So a Wookie walks into a bar..." Han: "Are you really that stupid?" Lando: "I let Vader in didnt I?" Han: "Good point." Lando: "...and the bartender says..."
Okay, if you dont post one of those, which you wont, they all suck, at least right something to let me know you actually read them
Aright not even that, why would you read them?
How bout a little thing underneath the closet caption to one of mine? can you do that?
Aright, fine, ignore me again, you always do
I think Im starting to sound obsessive, I should probably stop....
Han: "Well whaddya want ME to do about it?"
Han: "Whattya mean they updated three times in a row?"
Okay, Im done, sorry for the spam
Han, buddy you were the only thing around and Jabba needed a buffet table.
Han: "So who's bright idea was it to install a hyper-toilet in the war room?" Lando: "Don't look at me!" Chewbacca: "RRrrowowhrr" *plop*
"Cheer up Han, we can get Chewie a chew toy in a little bit."
Lando sings "Forget Domani" while Han and Chewy listen on in disbelief.
Lando: "So this guy Salvatore thinks he can kill anyone he wants!" Han: "You're kidding! Who did he kill!?" Lando: "Umm.. maybe we should talk about this somewhere else..."
Oh come on, Malt Liquor is SO much better than beer...you gotta see that.
"And then he tried to CHOKE me!" "Well, I'm not going to make him apologize. After all, you DID put me in carbonite!"
As the debate heated up, Chewie began to worry that someone would ask his opinion, and his big secret would finally come out: He couldn't understand a word that they were saying.
Chewie, thinking of Leia's Slave Outfit Has trouble standing up.
I will give you one million credits to sleep with your wookie.
No Chewie, I didn't bring any Colt 45
It's Smooooooooth!
Chewie: "Murrr, urr, muff" Lando: "No, I'm not that guy from the beer commercial" (one of these Colt 45 ones has to make it in)
"And I looked down, and there was this squid in my hands. A baby squid."
Yeah, you might be in charge of a station, but look who's got the ship
What do you mean the editor of the humour section is now constantly updating? What happened to empty promises?
I didn't know he already had a comb
Fish stories from a Galaxy Far, Far Away. Lando: I'm not kidding it was this big!
Two men and a little wookie.
See I washed my hands!!
Horror movies scared Han no end, especially when Lando described them to him.
Lando: Wait wait wait! I'm confused. Who shot first?
"Did you see that guy with the ice cream maker? What was that about?"
Just think about it, guys! I HAVE to be Mace Windu's son!
Lando: When you want to keep him Han, you sold walk and feed him everyday. So don't mess up your homework!
"Yeah, in the EU there was an Ugnaught uprising, but we dont read that junk here."
Lando-- Hey Han, does this outfit work for me? Luke said it made me look fat. Chewie, what do you think?
He tries to get away from LOTR but we still find a tie in, meet Orlando Callrisian
List of things to do after Episode III: Item 5) Get a pretty girl who likes me (challenging that)
Ahh Lando!!! TF.N Humor always felt so odd without familiar Lando in captioning.
Han: You'll pay for this, buddy ! Lando: Look, I don't KNOW how the womp rat got into your pants....
Lando: "Han, I swear I didn't see that overhead conduit, it came out of nowhere ... but it's barely a scratch, you won't even notice!" Han: "Why you!!!"
Now, on this segment of How the Galaxy Turns, we find that Han and Lando were having an intimate relationship behind Chewie's back....
Two soldiers in the back: Hah, I bet they never expected to see a caption about us ! Soliers 1: Aw crap. Solo's head is blocking my shot !
LC: Look, I'm sorry, you guys! Some of us just get all the breaks!
LC: Look, Han--what do you want me to say? You're always gone, and Chewie gets lonely sometimes...
LC: Sorry guys! Boba bet me $50 I couldn't fool you!
LC: Sorry guys! Boba bet me $50 I couldn't fool you!
LC: "What do you mean, 'where would I be if _I_ was a princess'?"
Chewbacca: "Come on, guys--can't I have a LITTLE privacy??"
LC: And that's how you makes a fool's money disappear!!
Han: Uh...Lando you did promise Chewie a new haircut. Lando: What do I look like the guys from "Barbershop"?
Lando: "So what will you do when Star Wars wraps up?" Han: "I dunno. You?"
Where's my wookiee? I won't work if I don't get my own wookiee sidekick!
Come on buddy, I've heard it's fun to shave your wookiee.
HS: Look, Lando--you can not be in the next movie. Now get over it!
LANDO: So then I tell him 'If it's the intergalactic house of pancakes why cant you eat the walls?!" HAN: Down
LANDO: So then I tell him 'If it's the intergalactic house of pancakes why cant you eat the walls?!" HAN: Down Chewie, don't beat him yet. I wanna hear where this is going
Lando: You know, I thought the same thing when I saw Empire Strikes Back. Leah shouldn't have kissed her brother, she should've kissed the wookie!
Hello, I'm the token black guy!
And so then Page Davis, the host, said that Time Was Up. Man Trading Spaces is the best show in the Galaxy.
Lando, Chewbacca, Han. What do these three have in common? They all have shiny, flake free hair. Two of them go to a barber shop, one uses new pantene pro-v. Can you guess which one?...Neither can we!
Lando explains a peer preassure problem to Han in Chewie, in a never released Lucasfilm title: "Star Wars: The After-School Special"
"WHAAAT!!!....................You said you were going to bring the beer!"
Don't worry, I can't understand my co-pilot either.
Han and Lando is trying to have "The Talk" with Chewbacca.
Chewbacca, I swear I didn't steal you shampoo!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lando has invaded the Humor Section too!
It can't be! It's not possible!
"what? she ASKED ME for the mustache ride..."
Information from the Bothans, hmm, that reminds me of a joke I heard. A Bothan walks into a bar with a gnort under his arm...
Lando: "Sorry, I don't know what I'm doing here either. I usually hang out at TFN Games."
Han: "you REALLY didn't know she was 16?"
You just said WHAT about Chewie's mother?
A moment later, the droid pulls a switch, and all three heroes fall into the Rancor pit.
Hey Chewie, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat! Again? Nothing up my sleeve. Presto! RARRRR! No doubt about it, I gotta get another hat! Now for something we hope you'll really like.
Let me get this straight, Lando- You replaced the Falcon's sensor dish with DirecTV?
Great, another Lando caption... WAIT!!! This isn't the games section!!!!! POSERS!!!
No, really! I didn't want to turn you over to Vader!! I'm over the Falcon!! I've got this new ship, Called the Lad-- Chewie, stop looking at me like that....
While the heroes were conversing, they failed to notice the droid in the back just set his eyes to evil.
Lando: Look Han, a five ounce bird cannot carry a one pound coconut. Chewie: roaaaaaar [it could be carried by an african swallow] Lando : Oh, an african swallow maybe...
Harrison: No Billy I don't like Colt 45. I'm a Miller man.
You mean I can get all my long distance calls for ten cents a minute?
Han, how about 50,000 republic credits for the Wookie?
I swear, Han! I was not checking out Leia!
A stormtrooper walks into a bar, with an Ewok on a leash....
travel to a galaxy far, far away
Yes i have a Jar-Jar action figure. We'll see how long he'll last under a microscope on a sunny day.
Lando: So I says to Mabel, I says...
look, chewies gotta have his injection before he goes
Look Han I don't love you anymore. I'm taking the Falcon and the dog. Oh sorry Chewy. The Wookie.
Lando: "I'm telling you the macarena is the new craze at the cantina"
Well, "Tom's biggest fan" your request from the Top Ten seems to have been granted!
"Well, how do YOU suggest we fit it in there?"
Lando, I told you, I'm keeping the wookie...
Hasbro releases its new "Expository Scenes" line to little success.
You're WHO'S dad?
Sure you can trust me. My palms are pink, too. Would a guy with pink palms lie?
It took several minutes for the "Wax Lando Ruse" to be solved, but in that time, the droid had been successful in stealing all Han's beer from the cooler.
Lando: Yeah and all they have to do is say 'Beam us up' and poof! right on board the ship! Han: That's stupid! Chewie: RWWeewwwRRWW Han: Yeah
"If you think you can get in and out of the Chewie suit before Peter gets back, then be my guest!"
Chewbacca wanted many things. He wanted Lando to shut up. He wanted Han to shut up. But most of all, he just wanted them to let him use the bathroom in peace.
12 parsecs? No joke?
"Seriously, guys, don't you think this cape is more '80s' than the last one?"
Lando wanted many things. he wanted Harrison's Agent. He wanted Peter's autograph. But most of all, he just wanted to crack open an ice-cold Colt 45.
I don't care if it followed you home. You cannot keep that thing.
"So you're telling me that with 10-10-21B I can get a 20 minute phone call for under a dollar?"
Chewie didn't understand one word coming out of Lando's jive-talkin' mouth, but he knew one thing: hair that good didn't come cheap.
Look, that is real crack, you think i'd rip you off!!??
Harrison wanted many things. He wanted to pull his pants up. He wanted Debbie Reynolds. But most of all, he just wanted to convince Chewie that Jerry Curl just wouldn't work on a Wookie.
Lando: "Shampoo, rinse, put conditioner, rinse and repeat" Chewy & Han: "Ooooooooww.."
"Yes, this IS the Wookie you're looking for. He's for sale--if you want him.
The discussion got heated as the three men fought over Taun We.
"Are you sure Lobot said that?"
"Maybe we should get together and start a punk rock band..."
Lando: "Hey, have you seen any of those captions by Ben S. Gaulk?" Han: "Yeah! I laughed so hard that I spewed blue milk all over my keyboard!" Chewie: "Rowaraa!" [TFN should post his captions]
The guy on the top right of the picture has the most hilarious bald spot I've ever seen in my life.
One more mess Chewie makes a mess inside my house I'll take him to the pound!
Lando "It's not my fault. You leave your Colt 45 in the fridge and it's gonna get drunk."
(han) Where is my belt, lando?!
If you needed some time alone, you could have just asked
Come on, Lando, who are you to judge us? ... And why are all those people scurrying off and mumbling about canon slash references?
pull my fingers. that's right, all of them
Lando: I love you this much
That medical droid is here because......?
[lando] "You know what I heard? I heard that Chewy's Birthday Party was on Alderaan. [han solo] "@#$&$%! Why can't we ever lose this guy!?!?
I'll take "Most boring picture in the caption contest" for a thousand, Alex......
Gimmie a cookie!
2-1B(Alex Trebek voice): Will you three get back to your podiums?!
With the stink of Colt .45 on his drunken breath, Lando staggers into the briefing room, claiming he was once D.A. of someplace called "Gotham City", and tries to convince his unimpressed friends.
Lando: "All I want to find out is, what's the guy's name on first base?"
Come on Han, How come you always get to be in the middle?!"
Lando: George is calling Episode III WHAT?!
Actually, Lando, aren't you the one who suggested i work for Jabba? Lando: It's not my fault!
Up till now, only Lando knew the house was haunted.
Even Chewie made fun of his cape.
Han and Llando act out a scene from "Who's on First"
The droid passed gas, and Lando takes the blame.
Lando: "Hey, what can I say, your looking at pure perfection kids."
So then I says to him..."That's no bantha, THAT'S MY WIFE!!!"
As Han, Chewbacca and the other rebels surround Lando, Lando begins to share his "pull my finger" tricks of the trade
While Han and Lando are talking about the mission at hand Chewie has his mind elsewhere, thinking about shooting han and taking the falcon to pick up the ladies at his home planet.
Lando - "Take it easy Han. Rember, she said she wanted to kiss Chewie, and I know he's the brother; but, come one Han, I never even kissed her."
Lando - "Alright, alright, so my Sean Connery imitation stinks, don't jump all over him."
Lando explains to Chewie and Han where the satilite dish on the Falcon is after the 2nd Death Star battle.....
Lando "And the Imperial says 'We got a ship full of wookie eggs, two of'em hatched, and one of'em already stole a bike'". Chewie -"Grwwwl" Han - "I can't believe you Lando, telling Wookie jokes."
Han, Chewbacca and Lando catch up on old times at the 10th anniversary celebration of the Fall of the Empire. Han: “Hey, Lando? You remember that time you sold us out to the Empire?”
Lando: Yeah and when you opened that door and Vader was standing there and said “I would be pleased, if you would join us.” You should have seen the look on your faces! HAAAA!
Lando: I hear they are filming a new SW Holiday Special. Lobot and I have a plan to stop it. Are you two in?
Lando: "What did I say about bringing stray dogs home"
Lando: Come on! Gimme a chance to win back the Falcon. Please? One more game of cards. Winner take all.
"Don't tell Lando, but he has a little piece of ham on his moustache... Ya see it?"
Lando:Yeah.. umm... So did you see that new Star Wars movie?... Yeah, it was pretty good. Solo: Is that what you wanted to tell me? Lando: Yeah, pretty much.
Han: "I said 'not a scratch'!"
Han "Damn it Lando, I just put that new radar dish on the Millennium Falcon."
Han "Damn it Lando, I just put that new radar dish on the Millennium Falcon." Lando “What? It was like that when I got it.”
Lando: Hey Chewie, I thought you were taller. Chewie:(Roar
"No, Lando - I'm not interested in your invisible 12-pack of Colt 45!"
Lando is babbling on while Chewie and Solo stare at the booger hanging from Lando's mustache..
As Lando talks about the plans to blow up the Death Star, Han and Chebacca stare at that hideous zit that appeared on Lando's face...
Lando: Why are you staring at me? (Chewie and) Solo: There isn't a booger hanging from your mustache (followed by giggles).
Up till now, only Lando knew the house was haunted.
And then I caught a goober fish this big!
"Han, I just don't think Leia is ready for beastiality, thats all."
LANDO: "Fifty credits? C'mon, Han, Chewie's worth more than that!"
LANDO: "...and so I started to lift him, and I'm telling you, Han, this Hutt was HUGE!"
So I threw the super-ball so hard, it bounced twice, and then broke a lamp!
you did WHAT?
I feel a song coming on...
LANDO: "So I says to Leia, I says..."
Han: "Hey Chewie, is Samuel L Jackson or Billy Dee Williams better at being the token black man?" Chewie: "RarRarrr!" Han: "Yeah, me too...."
LANDO: "Harrison, what do you mean nobody's gonna see my face again after Return of the Jedi?"
LANDO: *sigh* "Well, Chewie, I didn't let you win, so here are my arms. Go nuts."
"Hey guys, haha, funny joke, turnabout's fair play, now give em back OK?" " Well I'm glad you're amused by this. I ain't . You aren't gettin the keys back til you wipe all the graffiti off the Falcon"
Lando exsplains Newton's Thrid Law.
Lando exsplains the Combustion Engien
lando exsplains how diamonds are formed.
Lando exsplains what utensils to use when at a formal dinner.
Lando exsplains the game Othello.
Lando exsplains the motivation of Brutus in Julies Ceasar.
Lando exsplains the diffrence between florecent and incondecent light bulbs.
Lando exsplains how to pick a good canalope.
Lando exsplains how the blue light means special at K-mart.
Han, seeing the assassin droid behind Lando: Chewie...don't tell Lando, but look. Oooohh. Explosive injection. This is gonna be a bigger mess than Greedo!
Lando exsplains pros and cons of a war in Iraq.
Lando: "And so the bartender says, that's no wampa, that's my wife! Get it? Huh?" Han: "Chewie, rip his arms off."
Lando exsplains the diffrence of truth and lore about Robinhood.
Lando: You see, in the days of the Republic there used to be this species called Gungans. If you meet any, shoot them! They are annoying as all hell, but they TASTE GREAT!
Lando exsplains his delicious receipe for blue berry muffins.
Lando:....and to wash it down I recommend some Colt 45 premium malt liquor. MMMmmm. MMMMmmmm.
Lando:....and to wash it down I recommend some Colt 45 premium malt liquor. MMMmmm! MMMMmmmm!
lando exsplains empeachment protacal for the House of Commons.
Lando: Hey, guys! I JUST grabbed Leia’s ass!
After disappearing from TFN games Lando arrives in the humour section
Lando exsplains the history of the word shish kebab.
Really, it's true. I heard that there was a recall on Corillian Corvettes. Of course I would gladly take the Falcon off your hands!
Lando exsplains the quickest way to drive from Erie, Pennsylvannia to West Lafeyyet, Indiana.
What do you mean, I owe you money?
You're saying I'm going to marry Leia and have 3 kids? RIGHT...
"You know it to be true, Han! I am your father... and... Chewbacca is your.... brother"
Lando exsplains the solution for a Rubix Cube.
Lando: Did you here THIS one? Two Jawas walk into a cantina. The bartender tells them “We don’t serve your kind here!” The first Jawa says, “Utinni!” So the bartender shoots him!
So the second Jawa says, “UTINNI!” So the bartender shoots him! A patron asks, “Why did you shoot them?”
What? Don't lift my hands because my pants'll fall down? You mean like this?!
The bartender replies, "I guess they didn’t see the ‘NO SOLICITING’ sign at the door."
Lando exsplains how Galvatron used to be Megatron.
"Alright Lando, you said not a scratch. Get'm Chewie."
Lando exsplains why there's no tube Chewie's car tire, but is in Han's peddle bike..
Lando exsplains the FDA's food pyramid.
Lando exsplains how to chang an O ring on a toilet.
Lando exsplains what a prequal is.
Lando exsplains how the book and movie Jurrasic Park are diffrent.
Lando exsplains where to get a good price on shoes.
Lando exsplains the Tea Pot Dome Scandel.
Lando explaining how "phat" is Leia's ass.
Quite some time ago in a caption post, I submitted the following: "Show me the Wookiee!" On that note, I have but one thing to say...Thank you.
Lando exsplains the finner points of running a vinuard..
Lando exsplains how easy identiy theaft can be.
Okay, I take it back! Lord of the Rings ISN'T better than Star Wars!
Lando exsplains how a McDonalds francise is bought.
Lando: "Look, I'm sorry about the grooming! I promise i'll never go to 'Cuts for Creatures' again!"
Lando: Look, I said I was sorry about the whole "traitor" thing..."
Lando: Hey, Han. I guess now that YOU have a girlfriend we can stop calling you ‘SOLO’
Lando: If you guys see three Jedi apparitions walking around, ask them to leave because I didn’t invite them!
Lando: Notice I have nothing up my sleeves and at no time do my fingers ever leave my hands.
Han: What do you mean you have a date with Leia and you want to borrow the Millennium Falcon!
Han:...and then she called me a scruffy Nerf Herder and I was like LATER your Highness. HMMMPPPFF Lando: Good one Han.
Lando: Hey, Han. How’s your father-in-law the Sith Lord?
Whow--Han, Chewie! Look at the bald spot on that guy behind--NO! Don't let him 'em SEE you!!
Lando exsplains that on each new Nintendo Console a new hero, a diffrent charater but still named Link, takes up the sword against evil.
Lando explains that Checkers is to Drafts what a Knave is to a Jack.
Lando exsplains why the people of Raltear enjoy the sport of roto-pitch so much.
Lando: Hey, guys. Did you notice the “Death Stars” on that one! VAAAVOOOM!
Han's Bachelor Party: I hear Leia saved that Slave Girl Outfit for our wedding night? VAAAVOOOM!
Han's Bachelor Party: I hear Leia saved that Slave Girl Outfit for our wedding night! VAAAVOOOM!
Lando: "Come on, Han, if Chewie is ever gonna learn to dance, we're gonna have to show him...just take the female part this once..."
Han's Bachelor Party: Sorry buddy. I know you meant well but Wookie strippers just don't do much for me.
Lando exsplains how clever he is to wear a wrist watach that is also a wallet.
Chewbacca: Got Milk?
Lando exsplains how he learned so very much.
Han: Psst! Lando! 2-1B looks weird!!
Han: Psst! Lando! Chewie looks weird!!
Lando: Hey, Han. I guess now that YOU have a girlfriend we can stop calling you ‘CAPTAIN SOLO.’
Han:"Go ahead Chewie, bite the traitor's pinkie off. DON'T ASK WHY, JUST DO IT!"
Han (whispering to Chewie): Man! I can't think of ANY way to say 'Pull my finger' out of this one."
Chewie:"Hee hee hee..." lando:"What is that smell? I have to shove my moustach in my nose now!" han:"Well, I'm standing right behind him..."
Wow, they really did it!! They are trying to compete with TF.N games with the Lando captions!!! This ought to be good....
No really!! TFN Humor really updated 3 times in 3 weeks!!!
Do you ever understand what this wookie says
Lando: Really? They are trying to come up with Lando captions?? WOW!! (thats one!!)
Lando: "Chewie, how many times do we have to tell you NOT TO STICK YOUR FINGER IN THE POWER OUTLET??!!!!!!?????"
"You seriously think we're gonna buy the old 'so small we're off the radar' game do you?"
So many "you've got something stuck between your teeth" comments, so little time.
After watching too much Buffy, Han found himself staring strangely at Lando's neck.
"So I said to him, 'What's up with that? There's only one black guy in the whole Star Wars universe?' and all he does is grunt and mutter something about another being in the prequels."
Ok buddy don't worrk, it'll only be a trim i promise
"You never want to dance with me anymore!"
"So anyway, Leia's dad said he wanted her home by ten. I'd be careful, the guy's got a death grip like you wouldn't believe!"
"Okay, okay. I know the picture isn't humorous in any obvious manner. Just play along."
"Hey! Who's up for a game of grabass?"
Your nizzle has been shizzled.
"I said I was sorry! Now let's just forget about whole Man's Best Friend joke."
Lando: Don
Don't Pee on the Electric Fence
Hi Han...OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING... Han: What C3P0?
Lando: "Han, I told you. I'm not going to date you."
"This party is awesome! I'm glad we hired MC Two-One-nizzle Buh-fizzle there."
"Don't look now guys, but there is a metal skeleton staring at us..."
"No Lando. You're not going to get me to say 'nice pants'."
Ok ya that one i just submitted was dumb... don't read it...
Ok wait you probably already read it and then you were like, what the hell, I know
You know what 3P0 isn't even in the picture... I don't know what I was thinking
Ok you know what I am going to just shut up before I make myself look any more like an ass...
Did I just say.../look any more like an ass.../?
FINE, I admit it, I am an ASS...
I just desperatley wanted to get posted so I thought, he this is funny...
I know, I know you're thinking ok the chain thing worked once, but this is just stupid...ust desperatley wanted to get posted so I thought, he this is funny...
Shit you know what I just fucked that last one up...
GOODBYE...I AM AN ASS...ASS...ASS...ASS...
Used Wookie salesman
Lando: "Oh yeah, Han? Well, mine is this big!"
Ok we've replaced their coffee with Folger's coffee lets see what happens...
Lando: "Next time your dog fertalizes my lawn, I'm calling the dog warden."
Aaron Kenobi
So will you take the $900, or will you risk for your chance to win a trip. Remember, you could only get a trip to the cantina across the street! Let's make a deal!
Lando exsplains why there's no tube in Chewie's car tire, but is in Han's peddle bike..
Lando exsplains the birds and bees.
Lando exsplains the birds and bees.
Lando exsplains why Random Hearts was a horrible movie.
scene from "The Three Amigos 2"
"I'm telling you, I really heard Darth Vader go, Yippee!"
Lando explains why the kids don't want the Apple Jacks to taste like apples.
I'm sorry Han. It sounded like Chewie said "pull my finger!"
If you can't keep your dog on a leash then I'll have to litigate...
Lando explains how DNA tests worked to identify the Romanoff's remians.
Lando explains tips for bicycle saftey.
"Oh come on, you gotta let me be in these movies! The guy who plays Wedge is my uh...uncle, yeah, he's my uncle!"
I'm serious Han. I'm just a shaved Wookie!
Lando, I know you want to be a hair stylist but NEVER tease a Wookie!
Lando explains that he can not explain the Saved by the Bell plot, for there was no plot.
Lando: "Sorry, guys, but TF.N's servers just crashed. As soon as the fanboys saw me in this picture, they bombarded the editors with Colt 45 jokes, as usual."
Lando explains how much he wants to see the new Matrix movies.
Because Han, Simon didn't say stand up. Chewie wins!
Lando explains his dream date with lot of details.
Sorry I left all those Colt 45 bottles in the Falcon, Han.
Do you Han, take this Wookie, to be your lawfully wedded....
Because Han, she's a princess and I'm a QUEEN!
"So these three guys walk into a cantina..."
Give them beer instead of destruction Han
Lando always won at staring contests.
Lando: He's my wookie! I saw him first. Han: Oh yeah? Wanna play a round of sabaac to prove it, eh?
And after I shot the x-wing pilot (orange uniform), the little fat green guy said "God Oh my! Killed Kenney you did! Bastard you are!"
Chewy, Lando and Han try and figure out what a "Nerf Hearder" really is.
I know I busted your satellite dish but you can watch Sex and the City at my house.
Team Rocket blasting off again!
I tell you, it was this big! That walkin carpet of yours is a menace to the janitors.
Lando: Hey, did you hear the one about.... Han and Chewie: Yes!
whatever you do, dont give him your wookie kiss
And she had this big round ass that just wouldn't quit.
Lando-"I don't need the wookie Han!"Han- "Aw, but he's so cute and lovable!"Chewbaca-"AHEHEAHEHEAHEAHEH"
Han, look! I sold the Falcon! Look at all the money we made!
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Yes i know the gun "Works Every Time" but that's not the colt 45 I am talking about
What do you mean George is writting the script for Episode III?
"...and the bloody bugger got away! Musta been this big!"
Han: No Lando you can not use Chewie at your neck party as the novelty Rug.
Lando: Okay chewie, when a man falls in love with a woman, somethimes they want to express it pysically..." Han: I remember adolesance.
Lando: Okay chewie, when a man falls in love with a woman, somethimes they want to express it pysically..." Han: You sure we shouldn't explain the difference between a man and a woman first?
Lando: Okay who's in favor of posting Darth Rob's and Darth Gentry's next entry? Han &Chewie: AYE! Lando: Okay, Unanimus vote. Post thier entries.
In a surprise cameo from TF.N's game captions, Lando!!
Han: "What do you mean you lost the keys to the Falcon?!"
Finally! TF.N Humor makes a bid to match the Games Section lando capiton for lando caption!
Lando: "I'm telling you the fish was this big" Han: "Uh huh sure"
"Listen Han, all I'm saying is that neutering your pet is a humane thing to do in this stray Wookie world of ours..."
Han: "YOU WHAT?!" Lando: "Only this much came off the Falcon, only this much"
"Yeah, Lando's a guy who really knows where his towel is." (Forget Monty Python -- Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy rocks!)
Han: "Of all the Rebel bases in all the galaxy, Lando had to walk into mine. Play it again, 21B" (That is a piano back there, right?)
Han and Chewie stare dumbly at General Calrissian as he tries to think up a SW vs. LOTR caption that will go with this picture....
And, voila! No more coin! Now, if we check behind the Wookie's right ear...
Chewie's got a date with Lando, but will Han realize his true affections? Find out next week on "Two Overly-Paid Actors, a Wookie, and a Scum Bar"!
o.0 I don't even know where to start.
And you think I'm dessed funny!!
"Can't I find a beer anywhere in this universe?"
"I have 10 fingers!"
"Her butt was this big!"
"So what if my cape looks like Superman, I'm in Star Wars!"
Lando- "No, that dance did not look like Lord of the Dance!"
"So then I got her sweet sweet ass and....."
Han: Chewie's just afraid to go to the dentist...oh! Wait, CHEWIE! As in chewing, chewing, Chewie, get it. Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha...Ha...Ha......Ha....
So then the Bothan said,"Sir I do believe you bent my wookiee."
"Sorry, Harry. Left my Pokemon cards in the chalker."
"Hey, guys, do I know how to throw a bachelor party or WHAT?!?!.....huh?......well?....well?...
"And then she started screaming, 'OH YES! OH YES!!'" "Really??" "No. But we did dance though..."
So a wookie a smugler and a... oh you've heard this one
"I tell ya, my career is gonna skyrocket after this flick!"
"Star Wars Captioning #81" -or- "Insert Colt 45 joke here"
I can't believe it either! TF.N's humor editor has made three in a row!
Missing scene #42 from ROTJ: Lando accidentally says "beer" instead of "bull". Seconds later, a raging bull crashes through the wall of the briefing room. Next week: The missing Colt.45 scene!!
Han: "Lando, where are your pants?" Lando: "I must've left them at the Battle of Tanaab!"
Lando explains to Leia, just off-screen, just what eating too much of those ration bars will do to her butt.
"How much do I love you, Han, old buddy? THIS MUCH!"
"What, you don't like the cape? I thought it made me look like cool, just like Blacula!"
"I'm telling you, I don't have your wallet!!! See!!!!"
Now watch as I do my impression of 'The Fonz': "Aaaayyyyyy!"
"Ok, ok.... I washed em! Now can I pet your Wookiee?"
Lando's career as a motivational speaker never really took off, forcing him back into a life of shady deals and schemes.
And so I walked up behind her and....
"Uh... I need the keys to the Falcon."
"Ok, you ready? Here we go. 'Patty Cake, Patty Cake...'"
Is it just me, or does something about his stance remind you of Michael Crawford singing "Music of the Night" as well? - Tim
Lando: Han, I'm sorry I spilled malt liquor on the Falcon's Navicomputer.
"I'm telling you Han, the radar dish just fell off the Falcon!"
Hey Chewbacca, if this guy tries to pull a rabbit out of his pants or anything- Shoot him!
And so, Lando tells of his many adventures in the TFN Video game section's Captions. All the while Han is amazed that they actually update over in the other TFN sections.
What? You didn't expect me to tell Darth no, did you?
"You're Wookie? Remember, you lost him to me, fair and square!"
Lando: I have a new business, I want Chewie as my spokesman...wookie...whatever for Dust Mops!
Lando: Padme doesn't have the breats, but Taun We has got some nice legs!
Lando: Padme doesn't have the breasts, but Taun We has got some nice legs!
OK OK so i was a little drunk last night Han, and i took the phrase "How you Doin' Chew-bacca" to a new level
Are you serious?! David Prowse REALLY thinks he'll be in the Vader costume for Ep.III?
Lando-Hey Han, I just got offered the part of Colt .45 spokesman! I'm surprised they didn't ask you to do it. Han-Well who says they didn't, but I ain't crazy. You're the respectable one remember.
What do you mean??"Lando it's about time we talked about those capes"???
Chewie-[Oh that's real original, ANOTHER joke about Colt .45] ROOWR!!!
So these two jawas walk into a bar... stop me if you've heard this one...
Lando: "We gotta do something!" Han: "Absolutely!" Lando: "You know what we gotta do?" Both: "Toga Party!"
Han: "No! No! No! Lando, when doing the Hokey POkey, it's put your head in next, not your arms!!!"
Lando: "Wait! Don't tell me.....I smell right?"
Come on, 'ol buddy... we're still the only REAL Star Wars movies.
I didn't want it do come to this, but I get Chewie on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays and you can have him the rest of week.
Han: Did you wash your hands before dinner? Lando: Look man there clean.
Lando: c'mon old buddy, just this... Han: for the last time, no i don't want any Colt 45!!
Coming Up Next on Lando Springer... Best Friends With A Secret!
Lando: "So as I was saying, Me and Leia were getting it on in the Millenium Falcon" *Chewy interupts* Chewy: Baaaaaaaaa Han: Sure Lando, and Chewy here is a 7 foot tall african american in a fur suit
Lando: "I just don't understand it.... It's always the black guy that double crosses the good guys..."
Han: "Dude, where's my Falcon?" Lando: "Dude, where's your Falcon..." Well, you know how it goes...
As Mike Judge sits in the background, Billy D. says "Hey, Harrison, I got a great idea for a cartoon. It's about these two kids named Bervis and Buttmunch, they are extremely stupid..."
Han: "Spssss, Lando, you see that droid over there? I think it has a thing for me..."
Billy Dee: "I don't understand it, I've been working my tail off since the late 50's trying to get a good acting gig, and they make YOU the Han Solo? WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?!?!!"
Harrison: "Did you see how BAD that Mark Hamill acts? My god, I think that droid over there could do better..."
Wait... what were we all looking confused about again?
Whaddya mean you took down the fuzzy dice? They made the falcon's cockpit!
Han: "You mean the FAT dancer was chasing you while you were undercover!?" Chewie: "Rrrrrraugh?" Lando: "Yeah! I ain't kiddin' ya! Her butt was THIS big!"
Are you going to hand over the drugs, or do i have to use my sniffer Wookie?
"Nope, we weren't doing anything. What are you looking at anyway?"
So Han ol' buddy, there's this company called ENRON with these fantastic portfolios - Chewbcc, Jabdehutt, , I'm telling you buddy, you gotta get into this - it's a real steal steal ..
Please tell Chewy to flush next time!
Lando: Look how many times do I have to tell you - take your wookiee to the toilet before the meeting...
Look , It's not the Wookie that bothers me . It's just , I've never been with a white guy before .
Look , It's not the Wookie that bothers me . It's just , I've never been with a white guy before .
Chewie did you use my Shampoo again
After the Battle of Endor, Lando trys to explain the missing sensor dish on the falcon.
Lando: “So I was walking into the military base the other day and then I saw Admiral Ackbar, and I just wanted to eat him, badly. I admit I’m a sea-food lover, and I can’t help but think what a lit
Look, I tried to get you one of those generic soldier outfits, but contracting just wouldn't have it...
It's sort of like that whole Top Gun thing... you know... where all the "bad guy pilots" wear full face masks...
...but Tom Cruise always gets to pull his Oxygen mask off.
Chewie: the primitive humans seem to be trying to communicate
I can't explain it, I really don't know how I got back into this franchise
And that guys is REALLY why Han ended up in carbonite
Lando: ".....And all these little kids came up and said 'You betrayed Han Solo!!!' Oh, my kids were so ashamed....."
Lando : "You used a skifter that night Han! I want my ship back! And plus it really wasn't a ship on my lot!
Lando: C'mon Han what could go wrong? All you have to do is a simple cargo run for this associate of mine. Jabba seems like a really nice Hutt. He assured me that the cargo is legit.
Schwartz
Han, I don't understand it at all. How can you rate 'Smoky and the Bandit' as one of the top one hundred best films of all time?!
Say, would you guys like a ice cold Colt 45 before we go?
Lando: "Now! Where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you..." Chewie: "Wait.. why do I always gotta play Buttercup when we do this?"
Best friends fighting for the love of a wookie
Really! I am your father!
Hey, you just wipe that memory out of Leia in that bikini or Chewie here will wipe it out for you
I've got a feeling, it could be bunnies!
Don't look at me! I put my entry under SW is better than LOTR
2-1B: This meeting of Death Sticks Anonymous will come to order...
Why are still mad about that carbonite thing? I said I was sorry.
So I used a little too much explosives. Your hair grew back didn't it?
That's not the point. Have you ever seen a bald Wookie? It isn't pretty, pal.
No really! I swear I will not tarnish my reputation and acting credentials by doing any commercial work. Really, I mean it. Why you guys looking at me like that?
Lando: Hey, that's Chewie's hairball, not mine.
No, Married by Wookie is a STUPID game show idea!
Somebody must have told George how my stunk up till now, Han Hey just told him you needed to do something that did not invovle dracula
Lando: I once caught a gundark THIS big!
Lando: Chewie, you just lie down on the floor, play dead, then jump up and wookie roar. It'll scare the bejeebers out of those Antique Roadshow hosts"
Lando: ......and then he said " pray i don't alter it any further", and I was like pray I don't alter YOU any further, man you should have seen him run.
Lando: "Okay guys, hears another one... if you choke a Smurf what color would it be?"
Hah: No, YOU tell him Buffy wasn't renewed for next season"
The guys in the back: dude i can't believe you threw that spitball in chewbacca's hair and he didn't even notice.
Lando: listen buddy you wanted an escort but you never said a human...or a hairless human for that fact
Lando: Psst Han (whispering) i don't know if you noticed but this tall hairy freak follows you around everywhere
Droid in back: "This just in... TheForce.Net humor section is now being updated weekly, thank you." Lando: "Did you guys hear that." Han: ??? Guys in back: "Maybe its another drill?"
Lando, ever the pimp, tries to convince Han and Chewie for a little "rebel rouser" later on.
I swear I didn't know it was your mom!
Hey, catch me later. I'll buy you a beer.
"So they offered me this role in a movie about an archeologist, but I didn't think it would do very well, so I turned it down."
Lando: Aww, come on Han old buddy, this will make a GREAT humor submission!" Han: "I ain't crazy, do you think I'm stupid? This is just another scheme. Besides. This person has NO sense of humor."
Lando: "What d'ya mean no bathrooms on this ship?!" Han: "Just wait 'til we get to Endor and go in the bushes like the rest of us."
(cont.) Han: "Oh that's right. You weren't invited to that party. Ha! And no messing up my ship!"
Lando: "I said I was sorry for letting that bounty hunter take you. Let it go!"
Chewie: ar-aragha-uh. Han: He doesn't like you. Lando: I'm sorry. Han: I don't like you either.
Lando: Can somebody tell me why a medical droid is at this meeting?
"Han, have you seen my career around here? It's about this big..."
Han: I still haven't been able to get all the blood out of the carpet after you dragged Luke into the Falcon!
Have you seen the ears on my co-pilot? I'd be better off flying with Ross Perot!
Mind if I dance wiff your date?
Lando: What's wrong with Jar Jar? Han: After seeing EP1 and 2, I'm thankful they didn't cast us into EP3!
Han: Leia tells me she doesn't want to see me anymore. Something about how things have changed since I returned from Jabba's. Lando: Now, wait a minute. We all thought you were dead.
Where's the beef?!
Humor Ed, Would you increase this field by 55 characters, please? Most of the captions I have thought of got cut short just before I got to the Hah!
Han: This crazy timeline George dreamed up doesn't make any sense. Which episode are we in now? Lando: Yeah, I was looking forward to being cast with Natalie!
"Can you believe he still wears a cape in public Chewie?" "What? You don't like the cape? Come on, I love the cape!"
"I think we should turn him in" says Lando "Yeah, the Force.net would do anything to get there grubby hands on a photo of bigfoot!"
Wait 3 years for the origional trilogy to finally come out on DVD.
Sammy Davis Jr. in his little known screen test for Star Wars.
I'm sorry Han, but you're not the father...Chewie is!
Colt 45 for everyone!
Wow luke, I think you got too much sun on Tattooine!
The hand dryer is busted again, can I wipe my hands on chewy?
Hey Han, I think that medic droid has the hots for you!
Lando demonstrates the newest dance sensation to hit Bespin, the macarena!
Lando: I'm telling you all the DNA test are negative! Panaka, Typho, all the guys in the Coruscant Nightclub! None are my father. The Prequels still haven't shown where I came from.
Billy Dee: "I'm not saying that I didn't like the movie. I liked the movie. I'm just saying that I don't remember the Ark being used to melt people in the Bible."
No, you can't smuggle spice Lando, we're in a galaxy far, far away from Dune
Chewbacca's hair looks even worse inthis picture than normal.
Han, buddy people are starting to talk, maybe you and chewie should spend some time apart.
Look, only one of us is makin' it out of here with our career intact and all I'm sayin is people are gonna' be hearin' the name Billie Dee for a long time.
Just look back there, see, people ARE talking.
" Why am I leading the suicide attack?" " You know what Lando, Im sick of your whinning; kiss my wookie you whiner."
So, in all the movies to come, you're saying there's only two black guys!!?
Hey Chewie, when you gonna use that comb?
Han: "What do they call a Whopper on Bespin?" Lando: "I dunno, I didn't go into Burger King"
"Strange Love Triangles, on the next Jabba Springer"
Han: Lando, you mean to tell me there's no bathrooms on this ship? Chewy's gotta go man. You know what it smells like to have Wookie dung all over in a closed environment. Well do ya!"
Once again, Lando tells the story about how he checked an injured dewback for a hernia.
Chewy passes gas loudly but Han covers for his buddy and quickly blames Lando instead. Lando: "It's not my fault!"
Han: "How many times have I told you Lando not to give Chewy Beer!!!" Now he's completely DRUNK!" Chewy: "BUUURRRRRPPP."
Lando-I now pronounce you...........
Han trys to hook Lando on the worst blind date ever
Lando: "What am I susposed to eat now. Chewbacca ate my dinner, man." Solo: "Wookies are known to do that. Right Chewy." Chewy: "roars."
Lando: Chewie, I'm sorry, but the DNA test to those wookiees in the Senate Chamber came up positive....
Okay I got a good one. A priest a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar...
Lando: "Just because he follows you home doesn't mean you can keep him, Han."
Chewie looked incredulously at Lando as he called Han the cake-eating white boy he always knew he was.
Lando: Look nothing up my sleaves
Why's everyone looking at me? It's not my fault! Hey, whoever smealt it dealt it!
Lando: Look I'm sorry Lea really likes me... You know they say you never go back...
Lando: But son you must marry her she had huge tracks of Land!
Chewie you're right, hes not the guy from Rocky!
Lando: But Han you must marry her she had huge tracks of Land!
Lando: I like big Buts and I cannot Lie
Lando: Did you notice that everyone else is baling in this room?
Lando: She said "I love you," so I said "I know." Han: Hey that's my line! Lando: I know, and buddy it has saved my noncommital butt so many times! Thank you!
Lando: And so I said to the Nerf herder you can keep the Hydro Spanner! HAHAHAHAH Han: huh I don't get it
Lando again tries to explain To Han and Chewy about the Midiclorians
Lando: Ok for the last time when a man and a women love each other...
Lando: Have you guys read the New Jedi Order stuff? They're great! I'm making billions of creds on these new droids, meanwhile Chewie, you're pushing up daisies and Han, you're slobbering drunk!
So it turns out that, apparently, I'm "black!" That's the last time I go to earth, although they do have some good liquor.
Hey Han the generals have a pool going to see who's stupid enough to take the Endor mission, you want in?
Lando: "I'm telling you the truth! There really *is* a Maker, and get this...he wears flannel."
Lando:" nice chick over there." Han:"alright, alright, enough of you charm already."
Lando: "Seriously guys... I don't think anyone actually looks at my star wars picture caption submission! honest!!" Chewie: Roarrr!!! Han: "Yeah, you're right Chewie, I don't believe him either."
Han: "Out of order?!? #@$%!!!! Even in the future nothing works!" - - - Lando: "Uh dude, this is the past. Remember that floating text that we nearly crashed into on the way over here?"
Now han, technicly knocking the Sensor Dish off isn't a "scratch."
Lando-"What's a nubian?"
Han: "Oh no you DIDN'T!" (Followed by two quick snaps of the fingers.)
Lando: "Ok, now try not to stare at Jabba's man breasts. It'll be tough; they hang down to here."
All three: (progressively building a three-part harmony)"Vocational guidance counsel; vocational guidance counsel; vocational guidance counseeeeeelllllllllllllll."
No, Lando. I refuse to pay $6.95 to dry-clean Chewbacca. I can get it for $5.50 at Wal-Mart.
No! I refuse to pay $6.95 to dry-clean Chewbacca! I can get the same at Wal-Mart for $5.50!
Lando: "No, guys, listen. It's called a round. I start singing and then when I finish saying 'row, row, row your boat', that's when you start, Chewy. Ok, ready? One, two, three....."
Lando: "Excellent, I get the Millenium Falcoln. And you and Chewie can have this comfortable plastic bench." Han: "Wait a miunte..."
Bring it baby, I want some of your man meat!!!
Wanna get hammered?
I'll give you one million dollars to sleep with your friend
Lando: "Okay, so three Jawas walk into a bar.. Stop me if you've heard this one..."
Listen, I don't have a worthy post or anything, but I am a struggling writer and this is my best hope of being published right now. You got use this, please?
it's a good thing they gave me something for the swelling because they had grown to THIS BIG!!..counldn't even walk
I'm tellin you Han..she was gorgeous...she had this enormous...um...eyes
Yes I know you have hairy palms Chewie..but I don't..LOOK!!
Can you believe they cancelled my Colt45 contract?? Me? Lando "smooth" Calrissian? Somebody is gonna get some serious flaming Tibana Gas up their tailpipe for this one
..."Han, this is your intervention, You've got to stop hearding nerfs."
"Guys, I'm worried about Luke, he's started dressing in black, summoning this thing called the force and playing with weapons."
"So guys, what's up with Taun- We?"
Dang it, I was hoping for another SW/LOTR picture......instead, we have a pic that has nothing funny about it. CURSE YOU, TF.N!!!!!!!!
Lando: Nothing? Ok, bad joke, heres one you'll love, Two men walk into Mos Elsey...
Lando: c'mon babe gimme a hug! Han: you haven't called me for three days now mister! u ain't gettin no love!
Lando: "She only thing she gave you for rescuing her was money!?!"
So you see boys, I cant bet my cape to the Falcon back, even if I lost her in a bet. This cape is me, my soul my... essential Landoness
well... when two people love each other very much...
Is it just me or is Chewie on the toilet?
All I'm saying is that I think Lysol works better than Mr. Clean...
This whole Alliance deal ain't looking too good...I say we cut our losses and hyperjump out of here while the gettin's good.
Chewie (in cultured British accent): All right, gentleman, I'll listen to both sides and then make my decision. Kindly remember, we ARE civilized beings here...no fisticuffs.
"Pretty classy joint, eh? Hold on, I'll get us a couple of Colt 45's."
(L) "Come on, you have to help me pick up a girl, or this is gonna be shortest effensive of all TIME!!" (H) "For the last time, STOP SAYING THAT."
"What? Is it the shirt? The shoes?...Oooohhh, it's the cape, right? I knew I shouldn't have worn this stupid thing."
Lando: " So this Wampa walks into a cantina...." (suddenly Lando goes canatonic while Han and Chewie wait for the punch line another 15 minutes in silence until realizing so).
"A GENERAL??!?! What, does Ackbar think we're gonna have to attack some 1970's disco at some point??"
"Hey, if you see that fine foxy mama again, tell her I said something really groovy, like 'you truly belong with us among the clouds', except a little less jive, ya dig?"
"Not gonna give me my ship back, eh? That's ok...I suppose I can make some sort of deal that will keep the empire off my back forever..."
"Han, good to see you...and who is your enchanting friend?"
Bartender Droid RK-179 had seen Lando strike out weekend after weekend, but he'd never seen him stoop this low before.
WHOAH, WHOAH, WHOAH....you said I could borrow your ship fair n' square! C'mon, hand over the keys...I'll even fill up the tank, OK? Jeez...
(L) "What's dat choo said about ma Mama??? I think we better step outside..." (H) "'STEP OUTSIDE'?? Where are we, the Planet of the Rednecks??" (L) "YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN, YA CRACKER-ASS PIRATE!!"
(H) "I dunno...the pants say 'death to the empire', but the cape says 'bitch-slap the empire'". (L) "What about a nice trenchcoat or something?" (H) "No, but you're getting warmer..."
After starring in such exploitation films as Blackdraft and Black to the Future, Billy-Dee was so happy that his big break was finally here, and he would FINALLY be taken seriously as an actor.
Lando: "No, Chewbacca, I won't give you a lap dance!"
Han: Chooy is my friend you CANT EAT HIM!!
We're starving we have to eat him! Hans:NO WAY
(L) "Han! It's me, Lando!! Remember? Cloud City? Froze you in Carbonite?? Tried to date your girl??" (H) "Ummm, sorry man, doesn't ring a bell...(to Chewie)..let's get the hell outta here..."
(L) "so what's with that chick Leia? I treat her nice, buy her flowers, help her escape the Empire, and she barely gives me the time of day!!" (H) "Dude, you gotta show women you CARE..."
Lando: "....And so he says, 'Those aren't watermelons!' Ha ha, pretty funny, huh?" Han: "I don't get it."
Lando: " Ok so here was Saruman walking up towards me and told me that I had to turn you guys in. Han: "Did he say anything about tasting man flesh?"
" . . . so then the Humor Editor says 'Hey, that's not a duck!'"
Too-Onebee warms up his laser eyes to fry Han.
What do you think of my new cape?
Ugly, Hairy, male creatures that can't talk but can only say errruhhh don't deserve to be on this planet
Ummm, not me. I didn't drink all the beer in the Falcon.
I'm just praying that Lando isn't measuring out what I think he's measuring out...
"I swear to you Han, he means nothing to me."
oops i spelled "chooey" wrong.....its supposed to be "chewie"
So anyway, when I woke up the girl was gone and I can't find the Lady Luck, have you guys noticed anything odd?
What's wrong with Leia??? She's pretty, she's a Force adept, she's intelligent, she's friendly, she has HUGE... tracts of land!
Chewbacca was having another one of those dreams where he's at an important meeting with dozens of people and his best friends and then suddenly realizes that he's naked except for a bandolier.
Lando: "So then I submitted 80 captions to the humor section and NOT A SINGLE ONE got posted." Chewie and Han nod empathetically.
Lando: "Look, I wasn't talking to you, Chewy, when I said 'Who haked that up?'"
The droid's eyes glowed lustily as he stared at Harrison Ford...
Lando: "?Y los monos?" Han: "!Los monos son locos!"
Lando, gesturing at Chewie: "He clogged the shower drain AGAIN! Tell him to get a hair cut Han..."
Lando- God Han your so hot one would think u could do better than a wookie!!!
"You mean they actually updated the humor? Again?!!"
I swear, I didn't throw him in the dryer!
"And then I said, 'How mank licks DOES it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?' "
"So guys, I wasn't too confident, so I went to this old fortune-telling friend of mine...Well, he said we'd better cancel those plans for retirement, then next few years are gonna be rough."
"Anyone up for a game of bloody knuckles? Pat-A-Cake? At least give me something to juggle..."
Lando: Han, I don't even know WHY you try to get captions up on TFN. It's more pain that it's worth. Han: You know, Lando. You're right. I'm moving to Canada.
Lando- uhh darth vader threatened to kill me if I helped you, so uhh ya I have to imprisonate you
Lando- don't go in that room! i'm tellin you, its a trap! han- i know a trap when i see one! (opens the door)- heres a candy, vader. happy halloween. (closes door)
And the womprat was like-this big! can you believe it?
Lando-where the heck is vader? we walk into a room, and theres no one in it! Han- this is all legolas's fault chewi- aarrggghh Han- what do you mean maybe he went to the washroom? hes a freakin robot!
ok, so the holiday special was bad. who knew it could get that bad? Han- Don't...talk...to...me... from now on my name is Palval nicholi gerluchivich and chewie is my abnormally large dog, sparky
I don't recall this scene from any of the Star Wars movies....
Lando: Look,Han, they couldn't afford an assassin droid to kill me so they brought in 21-B. A medical droid! That makes me look bad! I mean, a FREAKIN MEDICAL DROID KILLED THE ALMIGHTY LANDO!
Lando: Lobot says you can't be in Bespin. Lobot: Are you sure I said that?
Lando: How many times do we have to explain YOUR mission? Even Chewie gets it!
Easy Han! Lea made the first move, I swear!
What do you mean you blew up the Death Star?!? I just bought a million shares!
Lando: I don't know who stuck that hydro spanner in your hyperdrive coil!
"Sorry, Han, I'm out of Corellian Ale. But there's some Colt-45 in the fridge behind Chewie."
Ok Chewie. It's time for your haircut.
No seriously dudes, in Batman I played Harvey Dent, but in Batman Forever they got some like, totally different guy. So it's me, but it's NOT me. That doesn't make sense man! THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!
Lando: "I don't know..... all I was told was that George wanted one of us *cough* Chewie*cough* to Jar Jar's stunt double when he dies the in the next movie
Lando: Did you guys see Mark Hamill in Caption #79 on the TF.N website? Han: Yeah. He looked like he just kissed his own sister.
What do you mean Chewie and I don't make a good couple?
Chewie! How could you have left me for him!?!
Han: Did you guys see Luke in Caption #79 on the TF.N website? Lando: Yeah. He looked like he just kissed his own sister. Han: HEY!
Next on Jerry Springer: Two men, one wookie. Who will win the wookie's heart?
Harrison: Well, you're lucky! You didn't have to appear in that god awful SW Holiday Special. Peter Mayhew and I may never work again after that stinker!
Lando: "See, now what you need is one of these here fancy capes and a moustache. That's what the chicks really dig. Screw this 'space-monkey with a belt' and 'vest-wearing scoundrel' crap. "
Billy Dee: You know, no matter how much Colt 45 premium malt liquor I drink, I STILL can’t figure out the plot of that SW Holiday Special.
Ok, I talked to Ackbar, and he told me that Luke had told him that Leia said that she like "likes you likes you"!
"What's wrong with the cape? I think it looks dashing!"
"Sorry Chewie, she said you're still not getting that medal."
"I see you've constructed a new Lando..."
You suck.
Hans: This is my new date... couldn't find anyone who was willing to date me... ;<
i wanted to bed a girl... not an ape you dumb pimp!
Han: "Now Chewie, go give your Uncle Lando a big hug and kiss!"
And then...we went to a pod race...and this tow haired kid won!
Lando: so this girl walks into a bar.......
Lando: so this girl walks into a bar.......
......and slowly begins to.....
......Wadda you take me for? I'm not telling you the rest! finish it yourself!!!!!! common I dair you!!!
you sick bastard!!
"Carbonite, yeah, heh, heh...that was uh, good times, yeah, good times."
Some guy just came blazing through the landing bay screaming "42, 42, IT ALL BOILS DOWN TO 42!" so I shot him, that's all.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Lando: So I asked my engineer to design a truly sleek twin-pod cloud car. I didn't expect something to look so much.. you know.. like a pair of knokers.
Yeah...guys, it's true...Apparently, this whole thing is the Jedi's fault...
Han Solo: All right Lando, enough of your fishing stories.
Han: Sorry what were you saying Lando?
Han: Sorry what were you saying Lando? Lando: why weren't you listening? Han: well it has alot to do with the dancing girls over your shoulder and a little to do with the simple fact that your boring!
Why they picked me for this role? Beats me...
Lando - "You throw me the Colt 45, --- I'll throw you the wip."
Last captioning: "Legalas"? TFN Humor just spawned a Mini-Balrog named...Legalas!
Mini-Balrogs: miniature version of a Balrog, spawned when a LOTR character name is misspelled, and given subsequent misspelling as name.
Chewie and Han hitch a ride on the zamboni...
See this link for more details: http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=644826
"Hey, he gave me a great price for the trade-in. Come on, the hyperdrive didn't work anyway!"
This is what happens when you don't use that Mach 3
Han - WHAT?!!? Lando - I'm... I'm sorry Han... I just couldn't find Chewie's conditioner anywhere
"I didn't know you weren't supposed to blow dry him!"
Han: "Can you just button your fly and stop bragging."
"Not now, 21-B is watching!"
"You're not going to pull that whole '
Han - This is the last time, Lando, i won the thing fair and square... Lando - Couldn't I just borrow it for the weekend, ive got a date... please?
"You're not going to pull that whole 'run off when there's a Death Star around only to return in the end and be the hero' thing again, are you?"
WHAT?? Chewie and I just slept together once, it meant nothing, i swear!!
Lando: "I swear, he just lopped the thing's head off!" Han: "He didn't even use a blaster? I'm impressed. This 'Strider' sounds resourceful."
Lando: "So you said 'Get me a new blaster,' and Chewie heard 'Get me a Jedi Master'... Must be the cellular static."
Lando: "Ok, here's a good one, a jedi, a wompa, and a blond walk into a bar..."
"I'm telling you guys, "Amway" is a tool of the darkside!"
"So...just what is Ackbar?"
Lando: seriously isn't Darth Rob great? All: yeah!
Ford: Lucas is bringing in who? Joel Schulmacher-Egads man!! Williams: "All I'm sayin' is I've heard rumors."
Han: I won him from you fair and square!
A smuggler, ambassador, and a wookiee walk into a bar...
Just think of it this way...Lucas can't possibly ruin our characters if we're not in Episode III!
"
"You won!? Thats it cheewie rip off his arms" "but...."
chewwie, chewwie riding through the universe, chewwie, chewwie with his merry men!
"And so this #@*% 2-1B here gives me 2 left hands!!!"
Lando: I hate to say it, but that droid up their is looking at you in a very......dusturbing manner
Lando: I hate to say it, but that droid up their is looking at you in a very......dusturbing manner
Behind the scenes, star wars: The illegal gambling ring was descovered after a patron tried to negotiate his way out of paying a wookie's pal *Later scenes edited out, Warning, do NOT try at home*
A confusing discussion as a few try to figure out HOW vader managed to eat that salad during dinner
I told you I don't know were your hair gel is!!!
Lando: Pull a finger. Any finger. Han: Huh. Chewie, pull all his fingers. Hard.
"You see? All we have to do is take some of Chewie's fur, add some superglue, and your bald spot will be gone!" "Wow... But Chewie would never do that for me..." "Of course he will! For friendship!!!"
Lando, "These hands were made for dishes, not fighting the Imperial's!"
Lando: "Han man have you heard? Hell has froze over man."
Oh god!! All the Colt. 45 jokes hurt my Brain
If the Humor section doesn't update, its because the server crashed with "Colt 45" jokes...
"I wasn't drinking in the alley I swear!
You said not a scratch! My entire tracking satelite is missing!
Lucas: "Uhg....Thats it, I'm buying TF.N and making it into TF.N Special Edistion!" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Guys! I just heard! There WAS another black person in the galaxy! Grace Hindu, or something...
Lando: Sorry...How was I supposed to know Leia would mix up her lotion with my hair revitalizer Leia: GRONNNK!
Okay....This is scary....Three times in a row they update on time!?
Lando: "Look, I'll give you $350 for the wookie. Last offer"
Shut the fuck up the wookie likes me
Mr Man
Han: Hay Lando, nice dress!
You take the wookie! NO! YOU take the wookie
"You aint NEVER fucked a Jawa like the one I fucked on Stravromula Beta...!!!"
Lando: Where have you guys been? All the guys at the Games page are making fun of me cause I fell in a hole! Han and Chewie: *snicker snicker*
"Look, Han, Chewie... I'm sorry I scheduled you for patrol duty, I TOTALLY FORGOT that it's Life Day. I'm sure the Rebel Alliance won't have a problem paying you time and a half."
fuck you bitch
Lando: Wait a sec Han, wasn't Chewie dead? Han: yeah, you can't really tell it's a stuffed model, can you?
Lando: "Han, I hear the next X-Men movie is casting for the part of Beast. I"m telling you, Chewie would be great for the part! Granted, we gotta work on his language skills..."
"The keg's run dry!!!"
"I'm sorry, Han...they aren't allowing any pets in the building."
"...and the one I caught off Tanaab was this big..."
Lando: "Han, you should have seen me! With this cape on, I can fly like Superman! You gotta try it!"
Lando: "So this Wookie, Twilek and a Princess walk into a bar..." Han: "Whoa, Lando, remember what we talked about? No Wookie jokes in front of Chewie, he never gets them."
Lando: "Han, I found Wookie hair in my shower drain AGAIN! That's the last time he crashes at my place."
"uh...yeah I'm really sorry about that whole betrayal and torture...can I borrow the Falcon?
Chewie:arrgghh gooo eehaaar....translation:Hans i have to go to the bathroom
PIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I swear you guys, this big, JLo's envy
Chewie: Arrgh Arg Wah Lando: What did he say? Han: He said you need some mentos . Your beath is kickin.
A friendly game of snap quickly degenerated
So I say to the guy; That's not my hand, it's my pincer!
I once caught a fish THiS BIG!
YAY!!! CAPTION CONTEST WITH A DECENT PICTURE OF HARRISON FORD, WOO HOO!!!! Now all we need is Jar Jar Bink's head on Carrie Fisher's body, wearing the Slave outfit, and EVERYONE WILL BE HAPPY!!!!!!!!!
I miss the one with Chewie choking the life out of Billy Dee.
Hey, don't laugh... I was drunk ok?
Han Solo scoffs at Lando's Mr. Potatohead impersonation.
New Age Raven STOLE MY CAPTION!!!!!! AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!!! *wails* *sniffles* *bawls* Hayden C., feel sorry for me and marry me? BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE DOES!!!!! CHRIS HANNEL DOESN'T LIKE MY CAPTIONS!!!!
So what, I thought he was a Chia Pet. Big Deal!
So... you have a competitor! Your thoughts have betrayed JediNet.com, too! Now, George Lucas' Failure is complete. If you won't accept my submissions, then perhaps JN.C will! so, BLEH!!!!!!!!!
Lando: "Yo Mamma!" Han:"Don't you talk about chewie like that!"
Lando: "Who's the Hairy guy?" Han: "TFN Humor section Updater, He's worth millions, they've been looking for him fior ever"
Han: "Not a scrach on her, I have your word?" Lando: "I'll have Lea for a week, now get going you pirate!" Han: "ok but next time we use my dice!"
Han; "At least I don't dress like I am living in the 70's!" Lando: "Well at least MY mom isn't a corrilion!" Han: "Your not supposed to use anything real....(crys)"
What really got chewie angry at lando...Lando: "Ok I got a good one, What did Chewie say when someone stole him trackter?....Raaaaaaww, he he he." Chewie: "Raaaawww!!!!" Han: "What he said"
No Han, "rarrr" is blue milk. He distinctly said "raawwrr", that's a smooth Colt 45, baby.
Lando: "Like you actually need a co-pilot, the only way he could help is by atracting all the lice in there...Oh?" Chewie: "RAAAAWW!" Han: "Ya what he said" (as if he could really understand chewie)
Lando: Why are you guys lookin' at me like that? Han: There's no booger on your face (followed by giggles)
Really Chewbacca, you NEED a comb!!
Lando: "...so the guy says "That's no Jawa, that's my wife!" Aw, c'mon! That's one of my best jokes!!"
Lando: I smuggle very illegal things. Han: Yeah, just say that closer to my shoulder. Lando: Why? Are you wired? Han: Shit!! RUN!!!
Lando: Have yo uever smuggled anything before? Wait a minute. Why did you want to talk about this in a police station?
Lando and Han practice the Macarena while Chewie, amused, looks on.
I didn't pass gas, I swear. Seriously, I swear!
Lando: Look, I'm sorry, I didn't know the ugnaughts had ticks...
Han: "Are you calling my girlfriend a wookie?" Lando: "Not exactly..." Chewie: "Wow! That means I can have her!"
Just because I smelt it doesn't mean I dealt it guys
After a while, you start to expect pictures of action figures. This one is unique.
"I'm surprised they didn't ask you to do it." "Well who says they didn't. . ." Wait. . .thats what they're supposed to say. . .
"So I says to Vader, 'Hey look at sexy Leia over there'. . . I think he's related to her somehow. . .
". . . then he takes about three months to update "Top Ten Star Wars Halloween Activities. . . but if he keeps improving, maybe we'll only be on the humor page for a week.
look lando, i told ya, me and chewie are getting married! Not you and me, Chewie and me!
Han: You ran around in a pink chicken suit for her?! Lando: It seemed like a good idea last night!
So then I says, "That's right, baby. I was in two Star Wars movies." She just laughed at me and left the restaraunt righ then and there.
And in the end he picked the other girl. Can you believe it?!
I did it, I DID it!, I got leia!!!
Lando: "We cannot stand against Peter Jackson. There are none who can. We must join him!" Han: "Tell me, 'friend', when did Lando the Wise abandon reason for madness?" LOTR fail me not!
Lando: "It is a gift! Give George Lucas the weapon of the enemy! With the tapes for Return of the King we shall make a fortune!" Han:"The tapes answer to Peter Jackson alone!" LOTR fail me not again!
Han: "Recruit, huh?" Lando: "Yeah, someone must have told them about my little manuever at the Battle of -- hey, wait, didn't they make me general?" Han: "Nope. Clerical error." LOTR fail me not!
Han: Okay, Chewie. is this the guy who sprayed you with mousse?
Han: "Hey, all I'm asking is that you take care of Chewie while I'm away for just a week! Now, he needs about fifty pounds of dry food daily... LOTR fail me not!
Lando: Yeah I know it sounds funny.But I'm really GAY! And I want to marry Chewe.
Lando: "I see dead people!" LOTR fail me not!
LOTR fail me not!
lando-but i don't want to kiss you wookiee!!!
Lando: "So an Ewok and two Wookies walk ino a bar..." LOTR fail me not!
"What's the big deal? I thought everybody loved the old 'let's freeze 'em in carbonite' gag!!"
Han and Chewbacca looked on with interest as Lando started demonstrating his role in the local performance of "West Side Story".
two guys and a wookie walk in a bar
Hey, come on Han, it was WAY before you met her!!
Lando: "Spirit fingers!!!"
Yes, I know you and Chewie were adorable when you were little, but....well, George decided that the story of ME as a child would fit better into Episode III.
Lando: Guys, I know this is going to be hard to hear, but Aragorn knocked both of you of Ancient and Forgotten History's ten hottest list and Legolas is working through the ranks too.
"Hey Han...don't let anyone know, but I think that 2-1B's in the wrong place..." "Oh, that's just Chewie's barber. His ammo belts freak out the normal ones.
Relationship Counseling.
We are the threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee........... Amigos! (I'll be damned if I'm the only one who sent this in.)
What? What do you mean I'm the only black guy in the galaxy?
hairy days
Lando: There was this one time...at band camp...
Lando and Han try to re-enact Caption #78
Look, all I'm saying is, if he's gonna stay at my place, he can drink the Colt 45 but if he's gonna use my shower, get his damn hair out of the drain when he's done!
Sorry Han! I didn't know the fur coat was Chewie's mom!
Lando: "Chewy, I looked in the trash compactor. It wasn't there either."
Dodge this.
STOP SENSLESS ARGUMENT... Think of the Wookies. (This advertizement paid for by the Forgotten Co-Stars Foundation.
So The Guy says, "Rectum? Damn Near Killed Him!!"
so what if i'm gay? i'm happy!
"I'm telling you Vader said Yippee..."
"I'm not kidding you, the Dark Lord of the Sith actually said Yippee!"
"I'm not crazy! I'm telling you he said Yippee!"
"I'm not crazy. Vader said Yippee. Oh look...men in white suits..."
Han: "Come on Lando, the card is obviously up your sleeve."
Lando: "You guys wanna buy some death sticks?"
Han: "You've got a lotta nerve showing your face here..."
The Official Princess Leia Fanclub has it's first meeting.
Lando: "Have you guys seen my sidekick guy? You know the guy with the bald head and everything? He's a droid I guess? I've looked everywhere..."
"Those actors didn't look anything like us."
Lando: "Hey, did you guys see that Two Towers movie?"
Han: "Hey Lando, how did the Gandalf audition go?"
"Wait, you blew up the Death Star, too?"
Han: "I hope you know you are paying for a new satellite dish for my ship. Yeah you know, the one that was knocked off, don't play stupid."
Lando: "No seriously! We actually FLEW INSIDE the f***ing thing!!!"
Lando: "Have you guys seen my new hat? I've looked everywhere."
Lando: "Come on, Han. Leia is just a friend, really!"
Lando: "What kind of name is 'Han', anyway?"
Han: "You talkin' to me?"
Han, The Good. Lando, The Bad. Chewie, The Ugly.Han: "You talkin' to me?"
Han, The Good. Lando, The Bad. Chewie, The Ugly.
I ended on a bad one.
"We mussssssssst have the ship. You stolesssssss it! Bad Solossssss. It is our precioussssssss. Give it to usssssss!"
Listen Han, it was late and I was a little drunk. I didn't know it was your wookie. Thats not what Chewie tells me.
I dont care if you think the fur is matted, the throw carpet costs 40 credits!
Lando: "And POOF! the rabbit is gone! Thank you, everyone."
As chewie learned, he isn't the only one who tears peoples arms off if they lose...
Han: "Gee Chewie, I wonder who took the last donut.. Lando: What??
were you the one making fun of my wookie?
HUUUUGE... tracks of land..
Seriously Han, I didn't know he's not from endor.. I didn't mean to hurt his feelings..
"A Corellian and his pet wookiee walk into a cantina, and - uh, nevermind."
Lando: All I said was a princess, a wookie, and a nerfherder walk into a bar...Don't hurt me!
Look man! Someone has to pay for the spot on my carpet!
Lando "Honest, I didn't know Vader was going to do that to you! How was I supposed to know that he was going to freeze you in carbonite, give you to Boba Fett, who would turn you in to Jabba the Hutt
Lando: "And so there I was, stuck holding the groceries, while Leia went off to Prince Xizor's Palace."
No caption really, just wondering how many "I once caught a fish, this big..." jokes you guys are going to get for this one.
Lando Calrissian, Businessman, Gambler, Smuggler, General, the man who brought the Macarena to a galaxy far far away...
Han: How come I don't get a cape? I want a cape too!
Look Lando, I don't care how much you missed me, no hugs!
Lando:"You take him.There's no way I can shave him!"
It's up your sleeve, I saw it!
Look Han, I gave Chewie a bath last time He smells and it's your turn
Liea's a hot babe, and you know one thing led to another. We thought you'd be frozen forever.
Hey, it's me!
"I swear I didn't call him a walking carpet! Honest!"
What do you mean my fly is open?
Lando: What do you mean George says we can't be in the next trilogy!?
Lando: Well my dad has a bigger AT-AT than your dad. Han: Nuh-uh
Lando: "So then I told him 'I can do that line, I can say it better than Sam see "VENGENCE IS MINE"
Lando: "So then I told him 'I can do that line, I can say it better than Sam see "VENGENCE IS MINE" Han: "Sweet"
Lando: Wanna see me pull a wookie out of a hat? Noting up my sleeve... presto"
Han: "Lando old buddy... lets get a few Colt 45's Lando: "Naw baby I don't do that anymore"
and now something completele different.. a man with three noses
and now.. number one.. the larch.. t-h-e larch
and now
n# 1
the larch
t-h-e larch
and now
french chessnut tree
I sure hope Monty Pythons flying circus was my ticket in.. (coz I got plenty more where those came from)
As usual the boys are discussing women, and this time Chewie add's his opinion by talking about Jane Goodall
Find the fish. (another obscure Monty Python refrence)
Lando and Han coming out of the closet: Lando: I'd rahter kiss a wookie! Han: That can be arranged!
I caught him red handed
Solo: Lando! maybe we can sell chooie for a nose ring! Chooie: RRRRRuaaaauaua!!!!! Lando: oh my god!!!!
Han: "You knocked my satellite dish clean off?!?! Man, how am I going to watch ESPN?" Lando: "Hey, it wasn't my fault!"
Lando:I'm telling you Han, that aint a royal flush!
Lando:That is the crappiest haircut I've ever seen in my life!
Chewie:Can you two fight somewhere else?I'm trying to use the jon.
Lando: "So then she said, the captions got updated!" Han: "Really?" Lando: "Yeah really." Peter Mayhew: "Damn, I"m so high"
Your name
My name
This is my caption. There are many like it, but THIS one is mine!
Lando: "Han, what's that smell?" Han: "Oh, shoot! I forgot to use the rug shampooer on Chewie again!"
The debate raged on, but neither Lando nor Han could get the other to budge on what Chewbacca's skin may taste like.
"Look, all i'm saying is he'd look better with a perm."
Lando: "Hey uh...Han...about this "not a scratch" thing you asked for..."
And she was built like THIS man!
Chewbacca wanted to get into the conversation, but for some reason all he could think about was ripping their arms out of their sockets.
"Han, I think when we lost the Comm Dish the big eared guy wet the seat. I don't think the stain's coming out, either."
I AM QUALIFIED TO FLY IT, JUST GIVE ME THE DAMNED KEYS!
Chewie ate Luke and there was much rejoycing.(Yaaah!!!!!)
Han: "You LOST the keys?!" Lando: "How was I supposed to know those were for the Millenium Falcon?"
LANDO: ...Then i open my hands, and the coin's gone!!!
Han: "Lando? Shouldn't you be at Videogames Caption Action?"
"Crouch! 2-1B is about to shot a beam laser!"
Lando -" But I thought YOU had the millenium falcon this weekend!"
"What?? Don't look at me like that...Everyone wears a cape like this in my home town."
Ya, OK, so maybe I'm not an admiral...but one day, I'm gonna be District Attourney of Gotham City, and I'm gonna clean up that town."
Lando: If you do doubt your courage, come no further because death awaits you with LONG, NASTY, SHARP, POINTY TEETH!
Han: I keep telling you, no matter how big a ship is, explosions in space don’t make any sound!
Lando: So an elf, a wizard, and a Jedi walk into a bar... Han: Stop, stop, I heard this joke in the LAST Caption...
Han: Alright, 2 words Chewie: Arrrrrrrg Lando: Chewie's right, Kessel Run Han: I hate charades
Lando: What's a nubian?
Lando: We're in the caption contest! Quick! Think of something funny! Han: Um...Uh...Chewie? Chewbacca: Roar! Han: What? Uh-I mean HAHAHAHA!!! That was really-uh-funny. Yeah... Lando: We're doomed.
Don't give me that look! YOU TWO weren't at the Battle of Tanaab!
Lando: I'm making you two an offer...an offer you can't refuse...
Droid: (announces over intercom) "Simon says everyone FREEZE."
Han:Lando! how many times do I have to tell you? stop beating on my poor inoccent wookiee! Lando:Sorry,Han, I couldn't resist
(After Lando puts a quarter in the droid and pumps up the volume) Droid: " LOVE, exciting and new, come aboard, we're expecting you, the LOVE BOAT, soon will be making another run..."
Lando: "There was a black guy in episode I. and II. I come in for V and VI. so what happened to all the black people in A New Hope?" Chewie: "Urg!" Han: "You know, you got a point there."
Han:look lando,chewie has to use the bathroom really bad Lando:i'm sorry han, admral ackabar says hes not stoping by the death star to see if he can ues their vaccinitys Chewbacca:RRWWWOOOOAAARRRRR
Lando:Han i'm having all these problems back at cloud city Han:stop whinny lando, your begining to sound like luke
What do you mean it's wrong to kiss a wookie?
"What? Im suppose to be ready to drive the Millenium Falcon with this stuffed animal here in 5 days??!!" "Sorry, no can do Luke, orders from the Boss, George."
Lando: Stop me if you've heard this one: This guy walks into a bar with a gornt under his arm and. . . Han
Lando: Stop me if you've heard this one: This guy walks into a bar with a gornt under his arm and. . . Han : STOP!!! Chewie: Arrrghrrghhhhhh
Sorry Ford...but it's cheaper to CGI you now of days than to use you for real.
Han, please stop referring those pig creatures in Cloud City as Oompa Loompas.
Lando: You like the pâté? It’s made of General Akbar.
Han: I told you, Lando, if we're going to do this right, we NEED coconuts! You can't make the horse noise without coconuts!"
Lando tells everyone, again, about how he single handedly ripped the ears off of a gundark
Look man, I didn't know what the score was going to be! It's not my fault my rhythm was off.
Lando: You like the pâté? It’s made of General Akbar.
Han: Wait a minute, you are a black guy that won't die in the movie? Lando: Yeah, I couldn't figure it out either.
Lando shows off his new wrist watch
Chewie inadvertantly sets of the spring loaded "droid in a box"
Lando stares disapointedly at chewie for using the showroom john again
Lando accidently drops a hydro-spanner on his foot
Guys in background- Left guy: I could of been han you know. Right guy: why weren't you? Left guy: Too butch
Look, I said i was sorry about that whole captuering-torturing-carbonite-freezing thing. What more do you want?
The trio discuss important news from the empire. Battles , where to strike next, how to defeat the empire and allow peace to reign throughout the galaxy. Meanwhile the droid behind just got a high s
The trio discuss important issues. Battles , where to strike next, how to defeat the empire and allow peace to reign throughout the galaxy. Meanwhile the droid behind just got a high score on pong!
"Hi, my names Lando and I'm addicted to gambling." "Hi Lando!"
Lando, how many times do i have to tell you, don't take the wookie comb!s
han - "i swear he just followed me home... come on lando cant we keep him..."
Lando: Hey, baby, who drank my Colt 45? Chewie: **Burp!!**
Lando: Look, Han, she had on that gold bikini, then one thing lead to another. I couldn't help myself!
Lando: "Guys! You are not going to believe this! The TFN humour edotor UPDATED!!!" Chewie: "Hrrrahaaah" (Riiiiiiiiiight) Han: Is that some kind of sick joke, buddy?
Lando: "Do I really lok like chewbaca?" Han: "You have enough hair?"
A scoundrel, a smuggler, and a wookiee walk into a bar...
"Hey, so I left the keys in the ignition!"
Lando: Sorry Han, but he got away. Han: What do you mean he got away! Did you see what that Steve Erwin guy did to Chewie!!
I'll trade you my cape if I can have your Wookiee
How Lando really lost the Millenium Falcoln to Han: "Look Han, it's a simple bet, we shave Chewie, and if he's *not* a Klingon, I'll give you the Falcoln. Promise."
2-1B, talented medical droid, navigator, and as the rebels were about to find out, jammaster.
When I was with Luke, I nailed a womp-rat this big. Han: Sure you did, buddy.
2-1B: I've just picked up a fault in the AE35 unit. It's going to go 100% failure in 72 hours. Lando: Quiet you. So anyways, she says "This one's eating my popcorn!" (canned laughter)
WAZZZUP!!
I once caught a fish "This Big!"
I'm so torn! I mean, on one hand, you've got Padme, but on the other, Arwen!
Lando: How was I supposed to know Vader doens't like Colt 45?
Whoa whoa whoa, let me get this straight.........I'm not Lando but I'm an actor playing Lando?.......you guys can think whatever you want but this nifty cape speaks for itself
What? Vader wouldn't stop tickling me until I said you were here
Han old buddy.....see you're still with the old ball and fur
So I was drunk and stumbled onto the set. Then the voices in my head started making fun of me, so I started beating the crud out of this gold android. Thank goodness Lucas said he can use the scene..
Lando: "I just died in your arms tonight!....."
han and lando fighting over which one gets chewbacca
Will it float?
LANDO: I wasn't cheating, honest, I don't know how that ace got up my sleeve, musta been an accident... HAN: Yeah, sure. Chewie, tear his arm off, would you?
Lando: So I says to him, "You think I asked for a twelve-inch PIANIST?" Heh heh heh... what, doncha geddit?
While Lando was suggesting a quick game of charades, Han and Chewie conspired to make a break for it.
Lando: Hey, Harrison have you seen Batman? Well I was in that movie too, heh. What? What the hell is Indiana Jones? No, dude, I am telling you that kind of stuff is no good.
You like the pâté? It’s made of Admiral Akbar.
You like the pâté? It's my own recipe made of ewoks.
You like the pâté? It's my own recipe made of Gungans.
"And then we picked up a a couple of girls in a bar on Tanaab..."
Lando: "What do you mean? Your voting me off the island!"
...and that's the Macarena. It's easier if you're black.
Well, we finally got a Lando caption.
Lando: So What do you think? Han (Effeminate) : Oh Girlfriend, that Nose looks Fantastic!
Whaddaya mean George isn't making Episode 7, 8, and 9?
I caught a fish THIS big.
Lando: . . . and then do you know what she called me (Han looks excited). . . No Han, not a "scruffy looking nerf herder. . ."
Lando: "Look, you've hooked up with Leia, so why can't i have a night out with Chewie? He's not cheating, you've just got to move on."
Lando:have you ever seen a bean? like really look at a bean? how bout shoelaces? Han: death sticks? chewie: aww man...all day... Lando: have you ever sat down for so long you forgot what day it is?
For the last time.. Indy IV will NOT suck!
But my buddy Aragorn swears by that shampoo!
Han, I swear, I didn't hit on Leia while you were gone. Anyway, she was all over Luk…. err..
Landon: 'I was, um, parallel parking your ship...like you asked me to...and...um...hey, its not that bad.'
Heh...see...it um...happened like this...these eight Star Destroyers fly in, and I had to...um...shoot the satellite dish at them to...to escape. Yeah...thats it.
Landon: "So I said to her, 'Hey baby, you're hot. Want some ice?' and she thought that was a great Hoth pickup line...why are you looking at me like that?"
I tell you man, I don't get it. The TF.N Humor section has been updated on time for a couple of times now! I just don't understand!
Lando explains to Han that Greedo shot first
What do you mean I won't have a career after this?
Lando: "What are you staring at? You want a piece of me?"
if we sell Luke to the Hutts, maybe they'll lift your debt.
Lando -- "I'm sorry, Han, but I have to elimidate you, sorry."
black dude: Hi there, welcome to 2 Star Restaurant..... White dude: yeah, me and my girlfriend would like a table for 2 please....Black dude:......*stares at giant fur ball* White dude: dont ask
Lando: "I swear, I didn't know it was Leia, Han...It was a dark room and there were so many people in there...."
Lando: ok, we all know that luke whines alot, but does chewie have to rip his arms off? Han: yes
Lando: So that's what I sent in for the caption! Han: And you actually think that's funny? Chewie: Rawrn
Lando: No, I'm serious. They were sagging down to here
I know I left my wallet right here! C'mon guys! It isn't funny!
Lando: "...to get to the other side!" Han: "I don't get it. What's a chicken?"
"You PROMISED!!! Not a scratch you said! So where is the sensor dish BUDDY?"
Lando:Now Han, When Leia called you a "Scruffy Looking Nerf Brain" how did that make you feel?...
Lando: Hey, why does Chewie only understand English but can't speak it? Chewie: I don't know.
It dissappeared! What's that behind your ear?
Lando: And she's Luke
Lando: She's Luke's sister, and Vader is her father. Han: I still don't get it.
Lando: And that's why X-Wings would beat the Enterprise.
lando-last night i shot a nerf in my pajamas, how it got in my in there i'll never now.han-ats summa joke boss.chewie-honk,honk
nobody expects the imperial inquisition, our three weapons are........
i'm going to spare you my "does this make me look fat" jokes.
Ok, so a droid, a hutt and a jedi all walk into a bar...
Look all I'm saying is that it's hard being the only black man in this series.
LC: This Wookiee is your...? HS: Co-pilot, Lando. Co-pilot.
Han: You what?! Lando: I slept with Leia! She was on the Falcon, and I was bored, and just happened! Han: You WHAT?! Chewie: Wooorgggooo (Go Lando! Go Lando!)
Han: You what?! Lando: I slept with Leia! She was on the Falcon, and I was bored, and just happened! Han: You WHAT?! Chewie: Wooorgggooo (Go Lando! Go Lando!)
...so I reach down there, and turns out this chick wasnt a woman...
Han: Did I just hear you say "wizard"??? you're so not cool
"I'm just saying: Isn't it a bit ironic that the entire Empire gets defeated by a bunch of little fuzzballs?" "Shut up and stick to the script, Lando!"
Jaded_Girl
tHE gREAT kRYSTOFF
NO! NO! NO! THAT IS NOT GOING IN OUR DORM!
what is chewie sitting on? could it be a toilet?
I'm really not kidding you, buddy. Han, you know you're my best friend, and if I say Enron is a good investment, then I say it out of the good of my heart. Really, is this a face that would lie?
Attention prom goers. to avoid bad hair situations, book your hairdresser far,far in advance.
Lando: Do you get it now? THIS goes here, THAT goes there. Han: Hey, that's good. I'll remember that.
Han: Can I keep it Lando, Can I keep it?please,please,please! Lando: You know what happened last time! Han:Awwww!
Han: What do you think you're doing? Lando: Look, I told Chewie I was only going to borrow the Millenium Falcon for 4 hours tops!
What do you mean they aren't putting a Return of the King preview on the end of Two Towers?!
Chewy! You settle this, who blinked first?!
Hey.... how bout a hug?
Thats right.... give em the death stare chewy...
She's got huuuuge.... tracts of land!!
Is it just me, or does the droid look evil?
Lando couldn't believe he'd said something so dumb even the wookie was giving him the DUH look.
You mean wookies really DON'T live on Endor?
Look Han! I won't date Chewy, I'm not like that.
Chewie debated over ripping both their arms off, Han for suggesting taking the falcon, Lando for refusing it.
"And there's nothing up my right sleeve..."
Lando: 'And here I have an almost-new refrigerator for sale! Only 2500 credits!' Han: 'Are you sure that's not a casket?' Lando: Well, there might be a few 'cold ones' in there... ehehe!'
jo-bannana
Hey, you guys seen my Colt .45? I can't fly without it.
Lando:....so this little hobbit has to go and destroy this evil ring....
Lando: Ok Han I'm sorry! But flying into a death star isn't exactly easy!
I didn't know it was the button for the escape hatch, honest...
Lando: Ok Han I'm sorry, but flying into a death star isn't exactly easy! Han: YOU F*CKIN PROMISED NO SCRATCHES ON HER YOU BI*CH! Lando: I'm sorry! I can replace the sensor dish! Han:Sick'em Chewie.
I don't know, Lando, I think the perm makes him look adorable.
Lando and Han stare at each other, waiting for the other to make some reference to Monty Python or Spaceballs.
No, no, no, Han -- you've got it wrong again! a parsec is a unit of TIME not distance!
I'm sorry that I said he smells funny. I did not mean to hurt his feelings.
Look, Han, I know it's hard to accept, but I think we need to face the truth: Chewie is shrinking.
What can I say, guys, I think Mon Motha is a babe!
"...And so I said, that's not a slab of carbonite, that's my best friend Han! HAHAHAHA!!!"
Yeah, and TF.N Humor Captions updated! If that isn't strange, I don't know what is!
Lando describes what HE was doing when the Christmas Special came on.
Does anyone notice I'm the only black guy here?
Luke? A Jedi Knight? TF.N Humor? Updating on time? I'm out of it for a while and everyone is getting delusions of grandeur!
I can't think of a caption... c'mon Han old buddy old pal, help me out!
Does you guys think this cape makes my ego look big?
Look, im telling you. Its a giant electrical socket!
So, now i hear that Luke's the son of vader, my mother gets ill and
Heyyyyyy Han ol Buddy...... I know what she means to you...... She is cute n to be famous in 20 yrs but I think Mr. Flockhart wont be letting you near her till she's out of high school at least.
"So let me get this straight . . . You're the ONLY black guy in the entire galaxy!?
Lando: I'm sorry, they arrived just before you did. The godfather made me an offer I couldn't refuse.
Han: "I think somebody wants a wookie waffle"
Lando: "Damn, I could go for a wookie waffle right about now."
Lando: Im telling you it was this big!!
Lando: "I had a big wookie waffle this morning with scrambie eggs."
Han: "There was a hair in my wookie waffle this morning."
What do you mean Star Wars galaxy's has been delayed again!
Land: I tell you it was this big!
Han: What did you do with Chewies legs. Lando: "Its not my fault"
Look i don't know what a parsec is either
"C'mon boys, where's the next crate? You're making me look bad!"
The "Happy Days" remake was not going well. Mr Ford was at a loss to understand Fonzie's motivation to jump the shark.
hey!
hey! i didn't know she was yuor little sister
Mother, look, i bought you that shaver for a reason!!
hey! i didn't know she was your little sister
Now look Han, all I'm saying is that both of you might need a haircut.
What do you mean? I was not trying to "mack" on Leia on Bespin.
Lando: "I'm sorry about the Falcon Han. I dident see the star destroyer behind me." Han: " Just wait till he's done talking Chewy. Then you can rip him apart."; " Han:
Where is the ring!
Do you mind helping us out, Lando? Chewy's got the runs.
But i had to shave him last week.
In an attempt to make the Original Trilogy more family-friendly, George Lucas has replaced blaster fire, slaps, punches, and witty insults with staring contests.
Lando: "Okay, here's the deal. Whoever can go the longest without a wookie waffle gets the falcon."
"So anyway, I conned him out of this cape and... huh? Han? Chewie? Why are you staring at my forehead? What? Is there something on it?! WHAT?! TELL ME!! IS IT A ZIT?! IT'S A ZIT, ISN'T IT?!"
Im telling you, Han, They're all out of Head and shoulders on the ship... the rebellion wasnt expecting the only wookie in the known universe to get a bad case of dandruff..
Seriously did we mention that theForce.nets editors are cool guys?
Im sorry Han old buddy, i just gave him a bath and one thing led to another, you know how that goes right? Rooooaaaarrrrrrr!!
Han: Lando, are you trying to tell me
Han: Lando, are you trying to tell me that you slammed the Lady Luck into the Falcon while docking in the hangar bay?!
Han: Lando, did you slam the Lady Luck into the Falcon while docking?! Lando: I might have. But I think "knicked" is a better word. And there are plenty of other good ships out there!!!
Look Han, I've asked every woman I know and they've all got dates to the Oscars already. Chewy will have to look somewhere else.
You said not a scratch, maybe I could forgive for one anyway, but the hole dang satellite dish. Chewie rip his arms out
"Look, I *said* I'm sorry about your dish! But come on, they've got some great rates on digital cable...
Chewie: "I'll just nod and pretend I understand... why doesn't he just speak wookie?"
yeah, that chewie one was a lame joke, I am aware of that. sorry.
Han: "Them sounds like fighten' words..."
WHAT!?!... its better than that blue thing I had.
Chewie: "Yeah, you're right, I do see some grey... Ya know, I've got some cream that'll take care of that. I'm pretty sure it works on all types of facial hair."
Yo Momma so fat...
Im not a virgin anymore!
Guys!, I just got laid!
Hi, remember me? I will haunt you when you sleep hahaha
So, wanna dance?
Look...the food will be here any minute...I swear!
Lando: What the hell? that's not racest1 I just said it hair looked nice today!" han: "You had a tone!"
Lando: What the hell? that's not racest! I just said his hair looked nice today!" han: "You had a tone!"
"Why can't you just give up,I have the dark side and the dark side always wins at a staring contest!"
Sorry Lando I don't know what got into him. He normally dosen't put his nose on people there.
Lando: "Look Han, how many times have I told you, beaming up is fom Star Trek!!"
Lando:"So, Chewie wants a 12 of Budwiser a 6 of Coor for you Han. I'll of course provide the 40's of Colt .45."
Lando: Hey Chewie, you're kind of odd. Han: That's it. If you mess with him you mess with me. It'd take a moon to separate us both (Can anyone say Yuuzhan Vong?)
Lando: okay so i admit i was a bit drunk when I let him fly the falcon, everyone makes mistakes. Han : Yeah but, most people should know better than to let OLD JAR JAR BINKS FLY MY SHIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lando: What? *long akward silence....* Lando: WHAT?!?
Lando - Chewie's a wookie not a rabbit!! Crap does stick to his fur.
Lando: "Chewie, your roots are like so showing!"
Ok, ok, here's a good one, a smuggler a pimp and a wookie walk into a bar...
"If you're gonna' have a wookie, have a wookie."
Han: Wheres my baby you scoundral. Lando: Look Han I already said i'm sorry, i just can't remember where i parked the falcon.
Good to see you old friend!!!!! (wisper) kill him chewie
"Dude, where's my car?"
Lando: "What? I'm telling you, that guy over there is Dave Matthews!" (The guy over Han's shoulder)
Aw come on Han everybody is writing "tell all" books.
What do you mean we wont be in the prequels
Droid in background "Psst Han, XYZ"
"I swear!! It was just sitting on Luke's arm.. a midichlorian on steroids... it was *this* big!!" - Lando
"Han, Han, Han.... My medical droid is a GREAT trade for your flea-bitten rug!"
Lando: Hey guys! I've got a great new idea for a business venture! Han: I've got a bad feeling about this.
Lando " Look all I'm saying is Calista may be a little young for you"
two guys in background "Man who is that wookie fooling we all saw him eating that cabage and cauliflower pie last night.
"Yeah, George just told me; they're going to re-name it, "Lando's Big Falcon Ride!""
"Greetings. You are all obviously quite busy planning some kind of an attack, so I will be brief. I am here today to tell you about the wonders of Tibinna Gas, the best darned gas in the galaxy!"
Lando: "I... just... like capes! Get over it!"
Lando: "I don't want to go to Endor. I'm afraid of the Ewoks!"
Lando: "O.K., but after the invasion, I want all of the Empire's Tibanna Gas."
Han: "If the Falcon comes back with so much as a scratch, you're going to be glad they have lots of medical droids on this frigate!"
Lando: "But I don't want Chewie. God is my co-pilot!"
"Han, if you want to impress Leia, let me give you some fashion advice...."
"It's true, Han. You are Luke's cousin. Chewie is his uncle. And I am his brother!"
"Han, I'm sorry. I wagered the Falcon on a bum pod."
Lando: "Funny, I have no recollection of delivering you into the hands of the Dark Lord of the Sith, having you tortured, freezing and blinding you. Let's just be friends."
Lando: "C'mon, guys, it's Monday night, you've gotta help me think up a caption!"
"George just told me that Episode Three revolves around my little maneuver at the battle of Taanab."
Han and Chewie listen with interest as Lando relates the wild night he had...
Lando: Why are there no black elves?
"Look, I know you all miss Lobot, but his drinking began to hinder his performance on the job and I had to fire him."
Lando: "O.K., I'll lead this suicidal attack. But first, will you join me for a little refreshment? Everyone's invited, of course."
Lando: "Alright already! I've already promised to improve the working conditions of all the Ugnaughts on Cloud City."
Lando (to himself): "I don't understand it... why is there no blue lightning emenating from my fingertips?!"
Lando: "I Love you." Han: "I know."
Lando: "Sorry I'm late, I was just having my moustache combed on deck 1138. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)"
"Man, You're stuck on the Yavin Swamp level? I'm still stuck on the kejim post level."
"You know, you do look like a porn star with that mustache."
"Look, all I'm saying is if you don't make it, Leia's gonna need someone to comfort her, and eventually she'll have to get on with her life. So wouldn't you rather know she's in good hands?" - "No."
"You mean to tell me, under that mask, Vader's face is painted like a Chicago Bulls Fan?" "Yeah, I saw it back on Bespin! He said it was in memory of some horny dude who killed his first master!"
"And then, I almost had this chance to do a cameo on this sci-fi show called 'Babylon 5', but I'd have had to be a Pak'mara. They're garbage eaters! I said I'd *fly* a garbage heap, not eat one!"
Look kids, where's the bunny gone? How about a round of applause for the great Lanzini?
"Come on, Han! All you have to do is take your outrageuosly valuble ship and pilot through hordes of the Empire's best trained pilots in deadly TIE Interceptors, not to mention large Star Destroyers..
"... and SUPER Star Destroyers - oh, those are nasty - and all kinds of hazards like mines and other crap, then fly through a laser-batter-ringed trench on that ginormous Death Star..."
"And fire a big Proton Torpedo through an eensie little hole! Come on, I'm sure you can do it, even though a micromillimeter could doom us all - I have faith in you, buddy! Chewie! Come on, help me!!"
So what you're saying is, deep down inside, we all wants to be white?!
I'm sorry the arrived just before you did and cut us out of Episodes 1-3
han: its tuesday, why the caption updated by now?
Comeon Han don't you two ever tired of Dick and Fart jokes?
Seriously, guys! Han, I told you to house train him!
Lando: "Look I didn't say I don't like your vest...I'm just more of a cape guy."
Han: "So, Lando. You and Chewbacca have been sneaking around behind my back? And this is how I find out?" Lando: "Please, Han, it's not what it looks like!"
I'm batman!
Lando: Hey I promised no scraches not dents, dings, and missing sensor dishes
"i thought your mom knew about "you two"!"
I believe the word you're searching for is "Space Ranger".
Most submitted funny caption: "We will be posting the best submissions in about a week."
Lando: Hey at least they aren't making you wear this silly over-sized wrist watch!
Han: There is no one named Kyle Katarn! Lando: Yes there is. He rescued me from Nar Shadda. Han: You're crazy! There isn't even a place called Nar Shadda!
"Pull ALL my fingers!"
Han: Oh yeah? Well I got the job while working as a stage carpenter!
"Sorry guys, there's nothing I can do. They're definitely gonna kill you off, Chewie."
"The picture quality is getting worse all the time!"
"This big, I tell you! THIS BIG!"
How much does this live carpet cost?
LC: Did you hear TF.N Humor is being updated regularly now? H.S.; That doesn't mean the submissions will be any better..
Han: All I'm saying is that before I was frozen in Carbonite, I had a watch that looked just like that one and now it's gone..."
Lando: "I swear to God the wookie waffle was this big!"
Lando: "They stopped serving wookie waffles down at the waffle house"
Han: "There's only one thing better than a wookie waffle, two wookie waffles!"
Paper beats rock, Han, I'm sorry...Leia's all mine.
"Chewie, I told you not to use my shampoo!"
What?! No beer?
Me? Cheating in a Sabbac Game? Never, please, Han, what do you think of your old Friend...
Your afraid you never see your stupid ship again?? What about me you ungrateful nurf hurder!
Williams: "I don't know man, I'd just like to be in a movie that's going to be remembered,not just this scifi stuff."
"Aw snap! This crib is off the hizzy for SHIZZY we'll be dogin' it for years bro!-Fortunetly the droid above Lando translates 'jive'."
(That's not like bad is it?)-seriously?
Fuzzbrain? Fuzzbrain? hey buddy you better watch it that walking carpet mite get angry.
Chewi tear his arms off! WHAT?
Lando: I'm sorry to tell you Han, but I'm getting chewy spayed
Look Han, all I'm saying is he could use a haircut. A little perm and some snipping. He'll look just like a poodle.
You want me to do what with Chewie, and where?!!!!
you see, we can't get a better picture quality than this... at least, until the DVD comes out.
Lando: WHAT!?!? Its tuesday and the page is updated!?!?!?
Lando: "I just got through watching 'American Pimp'. Please say you'll be my ho?
Come on, one week? Are you crazy?
Lando was originally only pointing his index finger in this photo, but the humor editor made sure to alter the photo by adding the other fingers.
"What do you mean, I'm 'different'? I'm just the same as everyone else in the entire...ohhhhhh..."
In an effort to avoid "cliches" and "pull my finger" jokes, TFN posted an utterly humorless picture.
Lando: C'mon, Han! Chewie said I could use the toilet next!
Han: C'mon, Lando! 2-1B said I could use the washing machine next!
2-1B: Wait... should I be washing my clothing in this?
2-1B: Hold on a second...clothing? Who's clothes are these anyway?
2-1B: Hold on here...clothing? Whose clothes are these, anyway?
Lando explains to Han that they will not be in the prequels because they are not "fast and intense" enough
Dude! Where's my falcon?!
"That's right Han, George just doesnt think you and Leia's romance is workin out, but he thinks we have definite chemistry. Now come on and give me a hug.."
Honest Han, I haven't seen the space Herpie
"Princess Leia is not my lover. She's just a girl. Don't think I am the one; the kid is not my son."
Lando: Can I have your money? Chewie: rrrr Han: Chewie, count to ten then choke him.
Lando: What do you mean? Chewie: Arrarraw! Han: He's right Lando, that really isn't your color.
WIld thing! I think I love you!
I'm tellin' yah boys. That female hutt from episode I, two hand fulls!!!
Lando- I'm looking for my pet monkey. You'll recognize it, it tells dumb moose jokes...
Lando: Wait a second- Luke and Leia are brother and sister?
Han: "You mean to tell me you had to help castrate the Rancor?" Lando: "YES! They were THIS big!"
Chewie! Don't crap on my property... dang! Too late.
Han: What... you mean they leave Jar Jar as is on dvd but change it around so that I shoot after Greedo misses?! Lando: That's what I said old buddy. Han: What's Lucas thinking?
Lando: What do you mean we're out of raisin bread?
Tuesday is coming up. Did you bring your coat?
Chewie: Lando, I keep trying, but I just can't get my hair as nice as yours.
Dang it Chewie I told you not to mess with the hyperdrive....
Lando: I now begin the first meeting of the Ladies' Man Club.
Is that C3P0 in the back ground? he looks freaky
Do the Macarena!
Lando: I lost the Sweeps (insert sweep noise), the beeps (insert beep noise), and the Creeps (insert creep noise), Han: (To Chewie) that's not all he lost
What the hell is this big ball of fluff sitting here?
Lando: "for heavens-sake Chewy, at least shave your face!"
Lando:"If mine is bigger than Chewies, then I should get the Falcon!"
Lando:"I'm sorry Han, I just think Indy would kick your ass!"
Look, Harrison, if we let George get away with this Ewok thing, then whats next? Little kids? Purple lightsabers? Midiclourians?
Billy Dee Williams: "I'm just saying that, I think, Star Wars would have been better if Greedo shot first!"
"Let me get this straight, Lando, our paychecks will be how big?"
Dude, Han, I mean, I knew you and Chewie were good friends and all, but.... MARRIAGE?
Billy Dee Williams: "I'm just saying that, I think, Star Wars would have been better if Greedo shot first!"
Han: You wore a black comlink with brown shoes and a brown belt? Lando: It's not my fault!
Lando:"What? A black man can't be general?"
LANDO: Yes, Han, I know I said that the Falcon wouldn't get a scratch, but , I was going into the Death Star , and, I LOST THE DEFLECTOR SHIELD!!! HAN: Hey, we can fix it... LANDO: Nobody sneeze, OK?
Aren't you a little short for a wookie?
I swear that I didn't touch her when she was wearing that gold bikini! See, no gold on my hands!
Lando: "I tried to free your Wookie, but Watto wouldn't have it."
Lando: "You called it my little manouver at the battle of Taanab? Well, your momma didn't think it was little."
Mon Motha never learned that Lando's "little manouver" really involved three saucy Twi'leks and a smuggled crate of spiked blue milk.
Mon Mothma never learned that Lando's "little manouver" really involved three saucy Twi'leks and a smuggled crate of spiked blue milk.
Lando: "Who gets Leia? Let's do a "rock-scissors-paper"."
Lando: "So then I grabbed her... hey, are we rolling?"
I can't get drunk anymore? I swear i didn't know it was a guy
No, that's not a black lightsaber!!
Sir, table for two?
Keep your eyes on the cards!
this is not the wookie your looking for!
What do you think of my "Superbrotha" costume for Halloween?
Pimpin' ain't easy, but it's necessary!
Hey, can I get my "Girls Gone Wild" video back tonight?
Lando: Look, you can pay me two-thousand now, the fifteen when you return my ho. Han: Seventeen, huh?
Did you guys see who made the finals for "Tatooine Idol?"
Han: Yeah Lando, good job flying the falcon in the death star. So what DID happen to my senosr dish? Lando: Yeah um... Solo: Good good. Sick'em chewie. Lando: Shit. (screaming. CRASH BANG EXPLOSION)
"I know, he still hasn't updated the captioning section. And I'm telling you, my "Fish was this big joke will kill."
So I was thinking you know I rescued you. Maybe I could get the Falcon back.
why?
what can i say, han? disco's dead.
Han: Bad news! JarJar hit chooie in the stick. Lando: when will George fire this guy!!!@#%$!!
"Come on! 'The George Lucas Laundromat & Game Room'... It'll be a booming success!!! I promise you!!! Come on, guys!!!!! Huh?"
TFN Humor is not updated yet? It's not my fault!
I guess the humor editor forgot about us!
Han: A General eh? Lando: Yeah, but the resolution sure does suck! Chewie: Grwwwaargh
Han: (To Chewie) do ya think he know his fly's down
I'm tellin' ya, that Dragon Snake was THIS big!
"I saved you and the humor editor, but Han, I can't make him update!"
"Han, old buddy. He hasn't updated yet, where's the money you owe me?" Han: "I knew I shouldn't have taken that bet."
Han & Chewie: "A Black General??" Lando: "Hey! Worked in 'Blazing Saddles'"
so i was sticking it in her ear.......
Lando: "So your saying I do look like the idiot who is supposed to update TFN humor,I guess so, but dresses worse than I do!"
"Look you told me to take Her (The Falcon), let your insurence cover the dish, not mine."
Han: GIVE you the Falcon!! Heck no, you're RENTING her!
Look Solo, if we just get him the distemper when he's in for his neutering, it will save us a lot of money.
Han: Are you the Lando that everybody is making jokes with?
I don't care if I lost the bet, Han! I'm NOT washing the Wookiee!
Does this cape make me look fat?
Many Bothans died to bring me this cape.
Han: "Sorry Lando, EVERYBODY has to go through airport security." Droid: "Please remove your cape, sir."
What guys, I have a little gas
Lando: "I heard that the admiral is going to let us eat wookie waffles for lunch!"
Lando: "You guys promise me something and don't make the same mistake I made. Never put snozzberry syrup on a wookie waffle. "
Voice in Background: "Did somebody say wookie waffle!?"
"You said what?"
"Now wait, lemme explain, ALL I did was hit the accelerator, how was I supposed to know it was in reverse!"
So i SEZ, Rectum, damn near killed em!
Well ya know I saw that one guy doing the chain deal and getting posted so I guess I thought u would post me too if I did that too
Lando: "Fine, I'll give you the falcon. Just please let me have the last remaining wookie waffle in the galaxy!!"
no i did NOT steal chewies hair spray...
What? They say cloaks are in nowadays
Han, Listen, if I knew it was the industrial strength Rogaine for women, I never would have offered it to Leia
"Look at you, a General!" "Someone must've told them I wouldn't work again after this."
Lando: "And now for my next trick..." Han: "Wait! Do that again!"
HAN: You mean YOU were the Bria was seein behind my back?!
Lando: Hey, listen man. I only borrowed your Blood Stripe ONCE and that was so I could get this REALLY hot fem- mechanic at Shug's garage! Oh, and another time...
Han: So what're you gonna do after Episode III?
Han: So what're you gonna do after Episode III? Lando: I dunno, what're YOU gonna do? Han: I dunno, what're YOU gonna do?
Han: "A general, huh?" Lando: "What??? Can't a black man be a general?"
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
Dude, Put the Legendary Chosen One in your humor files!
lando:Hey! you gonna buy your new carpit?!?Han: .....oh oh yeah!( Han grabs Chobaka instead) Chobaka:WWWRRRAAAA!!!!!!!!! Han: Oh damnit!!!! Wait! I like this animal! I'll take it!
robot:Hey!! stop acting like the three stooges!!!Lando: Damnit! the thrid time they catch us!Han solo:@#$%!
Lando:OK.I spin the bottle and see who takes furface! Han: .........come on!... yes!! Man behind them:spin the bottle!! you guys are gay!!!
Lando "What do you mean I am real popular in caption cation"
(L) "Why no updates?? They said they'red be updates!!" (H) "Alright, don't get excited...I'm sure Chris is a very busy man..."
chewie, i told you no sneaking out to get your tongue pierce, i am so disapointed!!!
Honestly Han! Sometimes I wish Greedo shot first AND straight!"
"What's you're problem...a long time from now in a galaxy far, far away, ALL bars are gonna have robot bartenders. I'm ahead of my time, man!!"
"Yeah, you're right...this isn't a very funny picture."
(Chewie, translated) "BOYS!! BOYS!!! Stop fighting!! You can BOTH marry me!!"
(Lando) "I wear this cape now, but I did wear a dress for a period in the 40's...Oh, they had DESIGNERS then!!"
(Lando) "IWhy do you think I took you to see that Holiday special?? FOR FUN?!?!? Well, i didn't hear anyone laughing!! Did you??...Except at that guy who makes the sound effects..."
(Lando) "Y'see, Han, a wookiee is more like a beer...they look good...they taste good...you'd step over your own mother just to get one!!"
(Lando) "I'm the magical man!! From Happy land!! In a gumdrop house on lollypop lane!!!"
What this is the same one a yester day. don't you ever update anything. the caption thing is updated. whats wrong with the world today?
(Lando) "Ya, it's a nice wookiee, but down the road you might wanna look into a nice round Buddah."
(Lando) "YOU PEOPLE MAKE ME SICK!!" (Han, with a lisp) "Oh, be nice"
(Chewie, to Han) "Why did you bring me to a gay steel mill??" (Han, sobbing) "I don't knoowwww......"
so, what happens if i submit a caption in between photos?...ha! confused you!!
So I tell him, "That's no Jawa, that's my wife!"
Did not, did to, Did not, did to, Did not, did to,
Lando: I told you the captioning wouldnt be updated on time!! Han: Im still not paying you 50 credits
Lando: "I'll be damned if i'm pickin this cottin"
Lando: Hey, it seemed funny at the time! Han: Funny? You call exchanging my hair extensions with Chewie's FUNNY?
You always let Chewy rub your back, why couldn't he rub mine! NO! He's not rubbing my back...
"Easy boy." (A reference to the Bob Dole Pepsi Commercial)
"Cousin It! I know you got a haircut, but...wow..."
Lando: They Need to Start updating the caption contest more. :Han:"No Kiddin'"
lando:so the next thing i know,she's a he and the police are there!
Han- you hid the body WHERE?
so you just shrug like this, and say "I did not have sex with that woman"
are you even allowed to say sex in these captions?
I hope so
who needs a hug?
LANDO: I swear it smelled like this befor i got here
HAN: your full of sh**
HAN: your full of sh** LANDO: no really the fish was this big
HAN: your full of sh** LANDO: no really the fish was this big
I'm tellin' you, we'd make a PERFECT boy-band...
Lando: "You heard me Han, us 'important' characters don't get to be in Episode 3" Han:"Why not?? That gungan gets to be in Ep. 3, and he's the one who gave that damn Emperor emergancy powers!!!"
"So I'm talking with Lance Guest the other day..."
Thats...good news.
Mmmehhhhhhhh.....uhhh....liddle bit.
Han: "You're kidding, right?" Lando: "No, really! I saw Luke wearing his father's mask and a pink ballerina outfit. He tried to say it was a jedi mind-trick, but he wasn't fooling anybody!"
"I'm telling you, it was a one-joke monkey!" "I thougth you said it was a moose?" "Right, a majestic moose, by the one-joke monkey!" "Rrauurrrr!" "I'm with you, Chewie--rip his arms off!!"
"I'm serious, man! That medical robot over there, he said 'Hey dude, I want you to spank my metal @$$ with a Lightsaber handle," and then, he winked at me! Gross!!! I thought he had male programming!
"I'm serious, man! That medical robot over there, he said 'Hey dude, I want you to spank my metal @$$ with a Lightsaber handle," and then, he winked at me! Gross!!! I thought he had male programming!"
SPAM!
Alright, chewie, so you grab the humor guy, I start kicking him in the nuts, and han, you show him the Holiday Special. THAT ought to make him update in time.
Han: So...Let me get this right, you were on endor, when suddenly a group of ewoks came and started hammering away at the satelite dish on the Falcon!?!?!?! Lando: ........uh huh....
Dude, Whers My Car?
lando: Somebody tell the wookie to rip the humor guy's arms off! han: Don't worry, chewie, you should've seen him when he had to write halloween things on Valentine's day that one time.
Lando:It's true! Nordic Film- and Stage-Fight Society holds their 10th anaversary Summerworkshop in Norway this year! Anyone who's interested in participating can come. I read it on their website.
Lando: "I know, I don't get it either! He was bang on time with the update last week. I don't have a clue why we're still stuck here..."
Han: Lando, i though I told you to stop it with the glue on the toilet prank. Lando: I didn't do anything!
Lando: "Two days, that's another Twenty bucks." Chewie laughs. Han: "I'll repeat, that bet I took on TFN Humor updating was the stupidest thing I've ever done."
Wanna go for three? You've no idea how harsh I can be.
Hey I didn't know that it was 3PO who flew the Falcon on Coruscant.
Lando: "Screw the wookie cookie! I want a wookie waffle!"
No its not going to be a planet full of wookies, its going to be a moon full of ewoks!
So I Took The Falcon Out For A Spin. So What? It Used To Be MIne Ya Know!
lando, "two wookiees walk into a bar" han,"Is this some kind of a joke" chewbacca,"I don't get
do you like my wig Han authentic wookie hair
C'mon, old buddy, you'll enjoy it! I swear its THIS BIG!
All I'm saying is why do we take orders from a squid?
Lando: "So the nets were down by three with 4 seconds left, and Kidd inbounded it from Kittles, shot the three, and hit it!" Han: "I'm Astounded!" Chewie: "RWWWWLLL!"
Lando: "So they imprisoned me on Nar Shadaa and Kyle rescued me!" Han: "Simply Amazing, Simply Amazing(leaning towards chewie; "I told you to disable all the switches!"
Lando: Hey Buddy, look. Still no update. Everyone can submit even more funnies! Han: I don't care. I'm just sick of them all being dedicated to you instead of me!
NO NO NO! hes supposed to stink!
Han, Chewie, and Lando still recovering from the tastless photo choice for the last caption contest.
The droids eyes glow bright when he/she spots the fuzzy creature standing with Han Solo. The droid has fallen in love with Chewie.
droid: PIZZA!!!!!!!!
I never know tfn took so long to updat WOW what a suprise.......
So I tell him, "That's no Ewok, that's my wife!"
Han, where is my souvinoir from tatooine?
HAN: Sorry, I just don't see it. LANDO: But Mon Mothma said I looked just like the Colt .45 guy!
General Boutwell outlines his Fried Chicken Chain. (that's for all you Undercover Brother Fans...all none of you)
Han: "I'm sick of that darned TF.N Humor editor saying 'I'll update, I'll update', and then not updating." Lando: "Hey, what are you gonna do? Send Chewy after him?" Han: "Hmmmmmmm......."
Han: It's two against one pal. You can't install a sabacc dealer in my falcon. Lando:*mumbles*Then I'll just break your freacking antenna you... Han: what? Lando:nothing, nothing
Why don't you try colt 45? It works everytime!
Han: Lando it's your turn to clean up the wookie poop! Lando: My turn?! I did it the whole time you were frozen ol' buddy! I think you have some catching up to do!
Hola, me llamo Raul! Vivo en beautiful San Antonio Texas! (I don't know why, but it just seems to fit for this one)
What do you mean the black guy usually dies first?!
Lando and Han get into the debat over weather Anakin will fall into the lava pit in Episode III.
Lando begins telling Han about when he went fishing with Jar Jar Binks and C-3PO.
do i have time for one last shmoke and a pancake, or what?
Lando expresses his partiality to Wookie meat as Chewy look on in utter horror.
WHAT?!You mean it's Thursday and he still hasn't updated the caption?!But...but...but he said so!*sniff*He...he...he promised!
*Guys in the back ground * " so, why are they fighting over the wookie?"
*Lando* " I'm telling you Han, a french braid would look much better on Chewie then a pony tail."
brymo\//
brymo\//
oh dere! a tristan is stuck on our ship again!
"Then I say that's not my wife,that's Chewbacca!"
Han: "You did *what* with Leia while I was frozen in carbonite?" Lando:"Its not my fault!"
Lando tries to explain to Han why he found two woman in the Falcon naked
" Han, this is the guy who made fun of my Halloween costume."
Chewie: "Niiwaaar?" Lando: "That's right, by a moon. And I thought Episode 1 was implausible..."
Han Buddy, Tuesday, Wed, Thurs, I'll update TFN humor. Trust me...
"Dude, where's your friend?"
"What? I'm just looking for your friend."
All I said was the humor editor for TF.N was a good looking guy!
Lando:"Damn it! Once again the caption page is not updated on time!" Han:"Blasted TF.N. They'll never learn..."
So this bastard Ewok thinks he can drive and he cut me off. So I blasted that motha. Oh wait, I forgot I'm not ghetto!
I'm telling you guys, the Watchtower has changed my life...
When Lando said how big the fish he caught was, Han and Lando began to disbeilve him.
Trust me, do I look like a look like a guy who would sell his friends out?
Han and Chewie were so busy listening to Lando's absurd story, that they didn't notice the Imperial spies behind them.
When it's storytime, everyone listen to Lando.
" I'm telling you, I don't know where his comb is!"
Lando: "It's Thursday and they STILL haven't updated captions!" Han: "I know, it makes me sick too.." ::Chewie goes into murderous rage, desiring to taste Chris's blood on his lips::
Lando: "PIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!" Han: "That was a one-time deal Lando. No one will ever again get posted just for saying 'PIIIIIEEEEEE'"
Ben S. Gaulk is DA' MAN!
Do you ever wonder about me Chris? Do you find me to be sane? Or am I just a little bit crazy?
I slept with your mother Chris.
That was a joke; I'm merely quoting the Celebrity Jeopardy skit on Saturday Night Live. Sean Connery always says that to Trebec.
Sean Connery is a filthy old, dirty man. He hits on women half his age in movies and he wears a skirt in public. 'Nuff said.
I know you're laughing.
Here's an actual humor submission that you may want to post if you have a grain of common sense/humor in you:
The situation got bad really fast. Chewie thought he smelled Alderaanian perfume. Lando said it wasn't a big deal: "It must've just rubbed off on me..." Han realizes that he hadn't seen Leia lately...
Pretty funny, huh? Scandalous too...
FART!!!!!!!!!
I bet that that'll get posted.
I gotta' get offline and do some homework, it's already 11:35. Good night, Chris, it's been fun talking to you.
Han: "You're kidding right? No way you caught a fish that big." Chewie: speechless. Medical droid overhearing fish tales in background: Priceless
I do wish that our conversations were a little less one-sided, though...
I'd give you my e-mail, but for all I know, you could be a some child molester living in inner-city L.A.
Not that I really think that, but one must be cautious in this day and age.
In any case, good night for real.
Mmmmmm... blue milk... ::drools::
Mmmmmm... Taun We... ::drools::
Mmmmmm... Chris's mom... ::drools::
I really hope that you have an excellent sense of humor, or else your going to hate my guts...
Buddy I didn't know. He said he would update on time, but he changed the deal on us. There was nothing I could do.
Sometimes I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall, but deep down inside I know your listening. Right? Chris? I know your there, you just can't communicate with me. It's very sad.
Maybe I should ask you for personal advice.
There's this girl I really like and I want to ask her out, but I don't know what to say. Can you help me? I'm sure a guy like you is a chick magnet. And, no, I'm not being sarcastic...
Me?! Sarcastic?! NEVER...
Anyhow, she's really pretty and I know this football player wants to take her to prom, but she thinks he's a jerk, so I think I stand a chance.
But I'm so NERVOUS!
I wonder if I will ever find true love, if I will ever be able to express my heart's yearning for her acceptance. Love dare not show its face...
Wow, this is therapeutic. I'm going to unload all my emotional baggae on you now...
I wet my pants in first grade and it was so embarrassing that I now compulsively go to the bathroom ever fifteen minutes so that I can make sure that I never have another accident.
I sometimes worry that I'm schizophrenic. But I know we're not. Yes, you are. Shut up. MUST HAVE, THE PRECCCCIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!
There's something else that I have to get off my chest: I have a third nipple!
Do you get the joke???? I have to get it "off my chest"!!!! A third nipple!
This is truly a lost cause.
Maybe I should make that into a real caption...
Chewie had to get something off his chest: underneath all that fur, he had a third nipple. Lando reacted with shock while Han tried to console his Wookie friend.
By the way, I actually stole the nipple joke from a friend, so I suppose I should submit it under his name...
Chewie had to get something off his chest: underneath all that fur, he had a third nipple. Lando reacted with shock while Han tried to console his Wookie friend.
Chewie had to get something off his chest: underneath all that fur, he had a third nipple. Lando reacted with shock while Han tried to console his Wookie friend.
Sorry, double submission. My bad.
Thanks for letting me talk to you Chris, I already feel so much better. You really are my best friend.
Good night.
"I'm too sexy for my cape, to sexy for my cape!"
rush home to your computer and register your disgust throughout the internet
worst episode ever.
i doubt you star wars geeks have time to watch the simpsons
rush home and post what you did when it was over on TF.N
Lando: "He's a walking carpet." Han,"No way buddy, he's a wookie, calling him a carpet might be hazardous to your health." Chewie "Wraaaa!!!!!!!"
Leia began to feel a challenge for Han's affection, when she saw the way 2-1B's eyes lit up everytime Han was near.
I have a cape and you don't so now.
I found him, can I keep him?
"I'm serious. It was a bottle of Colt 45 THIS BIG!!!"
And the Force.Net is is shut down because of the "And the Force.Net is is shut down because of the "I caught a fish this big!" jokes." jokes.
Han is shooked when Lando proficies that Chewie will die after being hit with a moon.
Han couldn't beilve that Lando didn't know what Midi-Clorines were.
"Nothing in my hands, now watch..."
"So you want me to pull ALL your fingers?"
"Well excuse me if I've never heard of a Woobie. Oh, sorry Wookie."
It wil make it *THIS* long! Leia will love it!
I swear I didn't fart!
Untill Chewie actualy stood next to Han and Lando he never realised how short he was.
Han: I thought you said they would update the captions on time! Lando: They told me they fixed it! It's not my fault! I'm doing all I can but I have my own problems to worry about.
Chewie, you are well hung, brothah! You could be a wookie playah!
L.C. What's the deal? Aren't the captions updated yet? H.S. Keep it up the smart remarks and see if you ever get posted again..."
And so I said to George, "George, the third movie was a bummer. All those furry little things: those of us with any sense had a wild desire to see them all stuffed.
Lando, Chewie and Han plot to make up blackmail footage of the humor editor with Jabba and an ewok. That'll teach him.
I woke up and there it was: The Flatulent Elm of West Reisly!
Millenium Falcon? What Millenium Falcon? I ain't seen no Millenium Falcon
So this Rodian walks into a bar...
You're just jealous becuase I've got a cool cape.
I'll take the Falcon, No I
I'll take the Falcon, No I'LL take the Falcon... ok, there's only one way to settle this
You say that again and I'll sick Lobot on you!!!
As Lando and Han argue, Chewie wonders if Lando's hair is real...
i promise you, not a scratch! see, none of my fingers are crossed!
HAN: Doyou have any idea what he's saying? CHEWIE: No, I don't speak jive.
There´s nothing funny in this picture.... or..... wait,..... yes it is ......... something special... no is not ... somebody help me! I don't have sense of humor
On this week's Episode of "Star Wars' Creek" Han: "You slept with Leia??" Lando: "Dude, you were in CARBONITE!"
"How do you know it was MY wookiee? He gets dipped twice a year."
"How do you know it was MY wookiee? Lots of species do that in people shoes."
"Then your 2nd Leutinent should have let the Wookiee win."
Sparing no details, Lando describes last night's exploits with a rebel pilot in a league all her own. Han: "How is that possible unless you're in zero gravity?"
"How do you know it was MY wookiee? He doesn't shed."
"Relax, Lando. That's not so bad. The first time Chewie and I walked into that cantina, we led the whole bar in a round of 'My Little Buttercup'. That is regret."
Come on guys, if everyone shoots paper on the next try..................................
"Look Han, you can believe what you like, but I saw your wookie rape that Jawa with my own two eyes!"
Billy:"So I said to George 'That courtship was nowhere near as believable as Han and Leia's'. And he said 'Nobody cares, they're just waiting for him to go bad'."
And chewies' bro showed me his **** and it was like this long!
Lando: I'm tellin' you, you just don't shave a Wookie...
Lando: I'm tellin' you, you just don't shave a Wookie...
Lando: OK, do we take him to a Salon or a pet grooming shop?
Lando: No, my costume is better... Chewie: *Growl*...
Lando: He wouldn't rip MY arms out, would he? Would he?!?
Yeah, I don;t get it either. He was doing so well. Let's look at the bright side: this is the first deadline he's missed in a month!
Nope, not updated yet.
Lando"I say we go and join star trek because this is just crazy!!!" Solo"Just because star wars doesnt have bikini specials on theforce.net doesnt mean we should go and leave altogether" Chewy"YAWR"
Lando: "So I do one Colt 45 commercial. Its not like its gonna stick with me forever . . .. "
Damn it, Han! I told you I didn't want to see your wookie.
please don't strangle me anymore, Chewie...
Han, do you have any grey poupon
I'm not the one who suggested he get a haircut!!
We took a poll Chewie, you're not in our poll anymore. We voted in Fett. So why don't get your ass outta here now!
Lando:...And so this dude named 'One-Joke Monkey' kept sending Ed all these captions about 'Moose' stuff...
"TheForce.Net forgot to update their caption, again! They're less reliable than Imperial spies!"
Lando: "Han, buddy, I don't think this page is ever going to get updated!"
"So, you know when the Humour section's gonna update?" "Nope, I'm just sitting around."
It's not my fault they told me they updated TFN captioning...
Okay Han I'm leading the fleet, your leeding the strike team, but who's going to update TFN caption?
"And you told her you'd arrange for her to kiss a wookie, that's funny, almost as funny as the TFN Caption, wait not really they haven't updated the damm thing."
(Lando): ... and I swear, Han, she never told me her age!
Han: "C'mon, buddy, just one more round of Sabaac." Lando: "I told you, I can't. TF.N humor section has been updated and this caption won't make it to the list."
How was I suppose to know that she was your girl?!
We took a poll Chewie, you're not in our club anymore. We voted in Fett. So why don't get your ass outta here now!
Lando: You frontin' brah Master C? Mah cape is all blang blang, dawg! Shiza!? Wats cracking up in hah, han chil'?
Obviously Han didn't understand ebonics.
You know, this caption was supposed to change... LAST F%&$N' WEEK!
Lando: Come on, Chewie. Everyone else wears clothes. Han: Back off of Chewie. He just doesn't want to be sucked into the commercialism of the clothes franchise. 2-1B Droid: I never thought of that...
so... do you wanna order a pizza... or... what? I mean, I was just gonna hang out, but... you know... whatever...
Lando: So as I was saying, blue lightsabers are cooler than green. Chewbaca:RAWRE! Han: Aw shuddup!
This is a genuine Kashyyyk rug! 50% off! Only 50,000 credits!
This doesn't have anything to do with the picture, but as long as you have it up, I will be submitting.
Lando: "Chewie, the test came back; I'm sorry, it's mange."
Lando: "Sorry guys don't know if we made it yet, they STILL haven't updated."
Lando: ...And I was bald, but I had this cool purple lightsaber! Han: You need to cut back on the late night snacks old buddy.
Lando: What? All I said was "you're looking a little thin on top Chewie."
Aw, come on. Wouldn't I look great in drag?
Lando: Did you hear, less then 100 days before the 5th Harry Potter book comes out!
Two Guys, A wookie, and...some place
Update the fucking page you goddamn faggot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And.... stop posting all this yoda bullshit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It also comes with this free walking carpet!
Lando:Heres our plan,you guys distract those maniacs and I..I...um lemme think here.I got it! I'll go to the bar and drink beer!
Han: "I just talked to him... He says he'll update the humor section on time if we provide passage to the Alderaan system."
Lando : Let's pray to the God. Our father who art in the heaven....
Han:"What's up with the caption on the tf.n humor site? He said check back wednesday night!" Lando:"I know man, you guess is as good as mine!" Chewy:"Arrgghh argh..." Han:"Yeah, that's a good point."
Chewwie - i'm waxing my legs for charity please sponcer me Han did
Lando"Believe me,HE'S the TFN Humor editor,Han!"
Lando: Look I didn't Kiss Leia ! Han: Then what was all that noise !?!? Lando: S*%t!! Chewbacca: ARRRAGHHH!!!!
hey, TFN has updated yet!
lando did you skip your shower again?
han: and you didnt get her number!????
dude, where's my ship?
Hey Chewie, did you get too near a static electricity generator?
No, Han, I had him cleaned last time. It's your turn.
Fugedaboutit Han!
"what do you mean my mustache is on crooked!
Han:You SAID captioning would be updated by Tuesday! Lando:It's not my fault! There was a problem with the connection on the ISB...niner...driver thing. Han: Was there a "niner" in there?
"Lando, you know better than to try to shave a wookie!"
Chewie and Han thought they'd seen it all until Lando wow'ed em with his tap dance rendition of 'Do Ya Think I'm Sexy'.
job!!!!!
Han, his constipation problems are going to blow this whole place up.(ground starts vibrating)
Han:"Were not in Episode 3?!?!"Lando:"No, but I landed us a roll in The Lord of the Rings."Chewie:(angerly)ROOOOOOAR"Han:Calm down buddy its not that bad."Lando:"Ya.No Jar Jar"
Lando: Chewbacca, I'm sorry but you're in the bottom 3 of "Cloud City Idol". Please join the other losers.
Lando: Ok, so a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar.......
Lando: Man, the drain was clogged again today. The bathroom got totally flooded! Chewie, you wouldn't know anything about that, would you?" Chewie quickly hides his nair bottle.
You will freeze on carbonite before I betray you
LANDO: Does this make me look fat?
"One last time, Han, where the heck is my figgin' money?" "I told ya, i was just on my way to pay u back before this Chewy piece of dong got frozen in carbinite and i had to ransom him back !!!!"
are u a wookie?
Robot in Back: (keeps repeating) "Update Now. Update Now. Update Now. Update Now. Update Now. Update Now." Lando: "They told me they fixed it. It's not my fault!"
Carrie didn't quite fill out the Chewbacca suit the way Peter did, but she was more convincing behind the Chewie mask than Tito was behind Billie Dee Williams' prop moustache.
is it because i'm black?
well why the hell dont i get a purple cape?
han: this isnt the wookie your looking for. lando: you stoned or something han?
Lando: "I let Chewbacca use my shower and then I go in and find the drain clogged with brown hairs that are this long!"
So,Han, I was saying...I just got back from the TFN Games captioning, and man did they have me doing some weird stuff.
*Insert fishing joke here*
*Insert intern joke here*
Lando: Ok, ok! I forgot the keys inside Millennium Falcon. Are you sure you can't fool the scroundel-proof lock?
Look han, its not his fault he wont update the humor section, he got loads of things to write about a movie that dosent come out for 2 years and hasent been filmed yet!
how is it that chewie gets a bigger part than me? Hes abig hairy gorrila that doesn't say a single word in the entire trilogy!
Lando: do you know why this caption has not been updated for a week when they've been doin so good lately?
Lando: Look, i know you can't find the Millennium Falcon but i wanted to say, it's not my fault! Han: Ok Chewie, your first lesson in lie detecting, if their pupils get big like that, guess what?
Han why didn't you tell me your wife was fuzzy?
Lando: I bet 'cha this'll be updated on time! Han: You're on!
Han:Tuesday night! You said he'd be here Tuesday night! Lando: So he's a little late, Han:It's half past noon on Sunday, Lando. Face it he'll never update us and we'll have to stand like this forever!
a black guy, a white guy and a wookie walk into a bar...........
Lando: "And then George will ruin us by putting in this over-grown computer frog-like thing that is single-handedly responsible for the creation of the Empire!"
Land:"C'mon you gotta believe be, I mean the prequel script isn't even any good..."
Lando: "So a Jedi walks into a cantina..."
"So, did he mean *this* Tuesday night, or just any random Tuesday night at some point in the future?"
Lando "Chewie.. shave" Chewie growls.. han "Well... yea he does but.. itsl ike constant purbertty
Yeah Lando, but wookie's don't rip the arms of TFN editors when they don't update
Lando: Look, I understand you are mad at me for freezing you, but you didn't have to make chewie kiss me for revenge!
Lando: "I think chewie likes me Han, do something about that pronto.
"I'd like a collar for my Wookie" "Looks to me like you'll need a pretty big collar..."
(H) "No Bellybutton!! You're a clone!! So the real Lando..." (L) "...first over cliff."
"I'm telling you, the caption guy is part of the Empire and wants to make you suffer!"
I have no idea where it is, guys. I looked all over but I haven't seen Geroge's ice cream maker since the last episode. Man, I hope he doesn't kill my character for this.
Wait, hold it right there Lando...I can just see my reflection in your eyes. How's my hair?
Update? Please?
...And here's the kicker! The Top 46 list has ALREADY been updated!
Lando: i havnt got the slightest clue when their going to update. Han: I wont bother to ask the others then
He kept saying: Can you hear me now? I had to do something!
This isn't the line for donoughts?
"Sorry Chewie, you didn'nt make it either..."
Han and Chewie didn't beilve Lando when he told them how TF.N update updated their top 46 list but not their captions, until they excessed their website on the Holonet
"I once caught a fish THIS BIG!"
Han: Awe come on Lando. That's just gross.
Han: Awe come on Lando. That's just gross. Lando: Hey it wasn't me, honest. Chewie:
Lando""You mean Chewie ISN'T CG?!"
Well, Han, looks like that stupid TFN humour editor couldn't update the captioning on time, again!
"Did you hear about that new P-16?"
Lando: They are out of wine spritzers. Do you want a fuzzy navel? Chewie: Roar! Han: Is that supposed to be funny?
LC: Day after day, I check. Nothing! I think he's yanking our chain. HS: I told you before, keep this up and you'll never be posted again...
"No, really. It's *this* big. I can show you, if you'd like, but I'd hate to embarrass you in front of your wookie."
"Pull My Fingers!"
"Its not about selling out, guys, the empire has medical, dental AND 401K available".
Be honest- dont you think I couldve done better in "remember the titans?"
Chewie: "Hey Lando! Where in the *@#! is the caption update?
Well look . . . If I would have known that those games were rigged, I wouldn't have lost the Melenium Falcon in that bet. After all . . . the Harlem Globe Trotters can only win so many games.
LC: I'm surprised they didn't ask you to update the humor section. H.S.: Who said they didn't? But I ain't crazy...
Lando: Whats say we blow off this attack thing, and go grab some Colt 45
Lando: Whats say we blow off this attack thing, and go grab some Colt 45
Two Men, A Wookie, and A Rebel Base: the hit comedy from ABC!
Lando: "Who do I have to sleep with around here to get a wookie waffle!?"
Lando: "They're trying pass off Palpatine Pancakes as Wookie Waffles down at the Waffle House!"
Lando: "They're trying pass off Palpatine Pancakes as Wookie Waffles down at the Waffle House!"
Han and Chewie are shocked when Lando tells them about the tasteless photo choice for the last caption contest.
chewie askes lando if he has problems with s**t sticking to his fur.. (you know the rest)
yea.. this caption is about as funny as a wookie going to the bathroom.... wait...it is a wookie going to the bathroom!!!
"Okay, I got an idea on how to get an update.....you guys with me?"
Chewie, i just have to know... how do you keep your hair so shiny and knot free?
Hey guys, did you see that new LotR movie?! It was GREAT!!
Lando "You guys gotta help me come up with something funny enough to get me on that theforce.net 'top 46' list!" Han: "Yeah? What's in it for me?"
"I swear! He updated the Humor section on time the last few times!!"
LANDO: Don't look at me as if i were Lucas! What's the matter?! HAN (looking at Chew): Were you that man who advised Leia to go to the hairdresser?
Lando : I bet you one Wookie we aren't gonna be in Episode 3.
Hey Han: I went to a galaxy far far away with these crazy people doing a dance called the Macarena, lemme show you. You put both arms out like this and then you..............
20 Minutes later: And then you scream out, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEY MACARENA! ::awkward silence:: Well I bet you couldn't do it.
Lando: "So I'm like 'Where's the update?' and he's all 'Oh it'll be up Wednesday!' and now it's Monday and it still aint up." Han: "My friend.... you REALLLY need a girlfriend."
Lando: You gotta help me!George is putting me in Wizard of Oz2:revenge of Ozzy Ozborn!!!!
Lando to Han : No, no, no. They rewrote the ending. I don't die in the Death Star.
Lando:no hablo espanol...NO HABLO ESPANOL Han: i told you already, i dont speak spanish chewie;*laughs*
[Insert "Seriously guys, it was THIS big" joke here]
How was I supposed to know it was MY turn to take it to the vet?
HAN: Hey Chewie, I think you're right....he does look kinda like Hitler from your angle...(I got this from looking at Lando's mustache...)
Lando:i'm telling ya han, leia likes you! Han:no way man leia loves luke, i see the way she looks at him ~through this argument it seems chewbacca was trying to tell han somthing about luke...hmmmm~
The good, the bad, and the Wookiee.
Lando:i'm telling ya han, leia likes you! Han:no way man leia loves luke, i see the way she looks at him ~through this argument it seems chewbacca was trying to tell han somthing about luke...hmmmm~
"Oh, and I'm the nasty Star Wars geek..."
Lando: Can ya believe how fast those TF.N guys are updating the photo captions?!
Lando: Arrrrrr, wraaaaar arrrw wraaar!
I told you, if he's not housetrained he needs to stay outside!!! Who's going to clean up this mess now? He keeps ripping the arms off the cleaning droids!!!
Lando: "What do you mean!? Come on Chewie!" Chewie: "Growwl" Lando: "You've got to be kiddin' me! I won't believe it!" Chewie: "Growwll" Han:"Knock it off Chewie.The cape looks fine, Lando. really...
Han: I'm taking Chewie. Lando: But, Han! It's my turn! You PROMISED!
Han, can you teach me some rhythm? Just in case we defeat the Empire, I don't want to celebrate by clapping to a different beat from the music.
han: he still hasn't updated. i just checked. lando: what the hell? i'm sick of this picture, i look fat in that cape!
han: lando i found him NAKED, in a TREE, with MARIJUANA. lando: well it wasn't MY turn to watch chewie.
han: i got a man. lando: whacha man got to do wit me? han: i gotta man. land: aint tryin to hear dat see? han: i got a man .....
Lando: " Hey, did you hear Hell is warmin up again!"
Dude...I just got laid.
"According to the Analysts on the Pravin III, the Empire's 48 deadline will end about the time we come out of hypespace. The shield will be down, right?"
TFN Humor Editor: Sorry, we aren't updating the captions today either. TFN Readers: YAVIN FOUR, THEY'RE ON YAVIN FOUR! TFN Humor guy: You see, Lord Vader, they can be reasonable...
Lando: Hey buddy. Remember the time I sold you and Leia out to Vader and got you frozen in carbonite. Ha ha. Good times, man.
Han: Heh, yeah. That carbonite freezing thing was your fault wasn't it? Ha ha, good times. Wait.............. I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!! Chewie, prepare to induce internal bleeding in 3...2..1....
Lando: Uh, Han...I don't know how to tell you this, but Leia just said that she found out that someone very close to her is her brother. Han? Han: Great, now I have to kill myself.
Lando: Pinch me one more time and I swear I'll kill you.
I've got a plan, we'll pin the shamrock to chewie...
Lando: No way am I kissing that Irish Wookie!
Chewie: "Growwrraawaarna!" Han: "What's that Chewie? You want to strangle the admins of TF.N for not updating on time?" Lando: "I don't blame him. I'm tired of standing in this screenshot..."
"I have a great idea. Let's post this picture on a website and ask people to comment on it. Then we'll leave it there and see how many idiots respond."
Look, I told you before, Han. Jada Marnew will never get a caption posted!
Lando: "...so this wookie walks into a bar and..." Chewie: "ROARR!!" Lando: "Okay okay, a JAWA walks into a bar..."
mdee droid" wow harrison ford is so hairy in real life"
Did you know they are making fun of us at TFN?
Have you ever noticed chewy looks like fozzi from the muppets
(Happened before Ep. 6 was filmed) I just found out the twist! Dath Vader's not really Luke's father, Leia's a fembot that's supposed to kill Luke! The gun's aren't in her chest, they're in her hair!
Oh, wait. Austin Powers was filmed waaaaaaaaaay after Ep. 6.
What do you mean TFN server crashed from all the Colt-45 jokes???
Chewie...look, I'm a businessman...I need to tell you about a cargo hold full of cash and a planet called "Sernpidal"
"Dogcock. Dogcock. Dogcock. Suck it, Jiles."
"It'll be OK, Han. Just have faith that the Humor Editor will have everything updated before you leave for Endor!"
After a few glasses of blue milk, all Lando could remember saying was something about Ewoks being "cute and cuddly".
Don't look at me, I don't know when humor will be updated
Lando: "I swear to God I won't put a scratch on it!" Han: "If I had a wookie waffle for every time I heard that......"
Lando: Woookiee!!!!!!!Woookiee!!!!!!!Woookiee!!!!!!!Woookiee!Woookiee!!!!!! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! I'm sorry I forgot what I was talking about...oh yeah I need to borrow five bucks.
What!? Chris hasn't updated the captions! Well, he can kiss a Wookie.
Whoops! I jinxed the Captioning by saying it would update on time.
Lando: Yep. Luke's "lightsaber" is THIIIIIS... big. Han: No wonder his own sister gave him tongue! Chewie: Schwing!
Lando: Mr. President... Han: Still here?!! Lando: Yes... Mm-mm... Of course, I do remember... 48 hours to get out of here... So, can I borrow your "Falcon", please?...
"Damn it, Han! I don't *KNOW* whay that mofo bastard hasn't posted the captions for this lame picture yet!!!"
"Do ya know what bantha fodder tastes like? DO YA? IT TASTES JUST LIKE IT SMELLS...Delicious!"
Hey, I thaught that TF.N Humor would be updated regularly from now on!
Well buddy, I think we have been taken. Let's go beat the crap out of the TF.N Humor guy.
[Chewie:] Mwhoooooooooo.
"See, starwars.com can update every week, heck, every DAY, and these guys can't!?!" "Lando, calm down..."
The Top 46 got updated but not captioning! I told you it was too good to last!
Han to Lando: It doesn't matter if Jada Marnew won the sabaac game. Chris posting her submission is as likely as me losing the Falcon back to you.
(L) "Is it updated yet?? Is it updeated yet??? Is it updated yet?!?!?" (H) "ALRIGHT, Don't get excited, I'll go find Chris and give him a hand!!!"
(H) "Well, look at you , a General...wait a minute...what's your shirt say?..."Federal Boobie Inspector??"
Look old buddy after we defeat the Empire, rebuild the Republic, reestablish the Jedi, have elections to rebuild the Senate, and I take a vacation the I'll update the TFN Humor site
Don't you guys ever change costumes??
Lando-Why the hell won't TFN update?
Lando:"I told Lucas that you shot first but he didnt wanna hear it." Han:"I should know! Im the one who shot first ! Mr. Lucas' version is all wrong !"
Lando: yes, its true, his sister, why are you looking at me like that?
You've heard of drum-head justice..well now we got Wookiee justice. You talk back to the judge, you die.
Han: "don't be too upset Lando: YOU where the original plan for the clones!"
okay... um... two words... a movie... oh, I give up, what is is Lando?
Han: "What's that, a Kwanzaa Special??? No thanks pal, been there..done that!"
2 weeks and counting
Look, all I'm saying is maybe he'd blend in better if we shaved him.
Lando has gotten tired of holding his hands up in that same position as he waits for a near eternity for Chris to update TFN Humor.
Lando met only a cold stare from Han and Chewie as he tried to explain how the Falcon lost its 1,000 dollar satellite dish that captured 800+ channels.
While in the starship's recreation room, Han and Lando had an argument over who would be the first to play the medical droid in a match of foosball.
If you look closely in this one scene of Return of the Jedi, you can see that Chewbacca isn't a person in a suit but rather a puppet skillfully controlled by Harrison Ford.
"It wasn't Me, it was Chewy!" "No it wasn't that's how he normaly smells."
I have no idea when they are going to post the winning entries for the caption contest!
Han: What do you mean, I can't have your cape? Lando: Sorry, buddy, but I promised Chewbacca he could wear it later. And you know what happens when you piss off a Wookiee!!
Quick! Staring contest! Go!
Lando: TFN: Humor broke down again, much like that hunk of junk you call a starship. Can you guys fix it? Han: I can't guarantee anything.
Random Hearts? 6 days and 7 nights? Why Harrison, Why??
and I quote:Check back Tuesday night for the full lists! -CH....well? yeah thats right it's past Tuesday! did you hear me PAST TUESDAY!!! late again tut tut tut!!!
It.s not my fault....The Force Net Humor guy must have forgot to update this.
Lando: Why can't that humour editor keep up that run of updating on time?
by Ajent Orenj
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Father Anderson
by Evil the Cat
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by Evil the Cat
by TK924
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Anakeen
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by Leia goes digital in the new edition!
by Kami
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by Sean
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by Son Of Jorel
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by attackrat
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by squealing cat
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by Laura the infamous B
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by Jedi Tim
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by RU ARTOO?
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by general zed
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by Lando: "How many times do I have to tell
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by *waves hand* you will post my caption
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by now lando attemps the macarena
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by Well lets just say its *this* big.
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by hey... I LIKE Lando...
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by Kenya Starflight
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by Ashley Skywalker #1
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by 2 foolish mortals who will not be posted
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by 2 foolish mortals who will not be posted
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by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Darth Lando
by Jelp
by SvF_BD_02_Wedge
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Jedi Schmedi
by Wyler Jraysen
by rabid jawa
by Andrew S
by Rauc
by Rauc
by Rappertunie
by Rappertunie
by Rappertunie
by
by Big D
by RPM
by Gary Morgan
by geebus
by meorg
by Irish
by GLM
by MLEE
by Dr. Flap
by Walter Danek
by Walter Danek
by Walter Danek
by Walter Danek
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by noble
by person
by
by by austin texen
by marajay
by ObiWartKenobi
by ObiWartKenobi
by ObiWartKenobi
by James Fett
by Your caption
by My caption
by z00t
by Ryan C
by Ryan C
by Ryan C
by Ryan C
by Matt Stevenson
by Ryan C
by Ryan C
by PIPSTER
by Evil Clonetrooper 1138
by the slightly beige side of the Force
by Josh!!!!!!!!!!!!
by Wili
by Wili
by Oboid
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Son Of Jorel
by Son Of Jorel
by CK
by CK
by doggans
by The Real Clonetrooper
by John the Enforcer
by John the Enforcer
by Jello.
by corillian princess
by Jello.
by Darth Brother
by corillian princess
by corillian princess
by Big Bob
by Old Cheese
by Lori
by Lori
by Darth Drama Diva
by Son Of Jorel
by Son Of Jorel
by Tries too hard
by jedimaster7705
by jack-o
by Son Of Jorel
by Jedi Fett
by IonosFear
by IonosFear
by IonosFear
by IonosFear
by IonosFear
by Strong Bad
by IonosFear
by IonosFear
by Master of the Blue Saber
by the Dude
by cyrus
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Meany
by D@RTH D@RK V@DER
by Eli is cool
by Kirk
by soontide
by Cloud Timat
by Rappertunie
by Rappertunie
by padme_amidala_19
by Rappertunie
by Miana Kenobi
by Miana Kenobi
by Miana Kenobi
by jennifer
by Darth Blah
by Darth Blah
by Darth Blah
by Darth Blah
by Darth Blah
by galaleio
by Rumplestiltzken
by Nemesis
by SagaMasterXK
by JHP
by Jergo
by Son Of Jorel
by Son Of Jorel
by Son Of Jorel
by Mamow Nadon
by DarthBane03
by sketch
by Darth Finklebert
by Darth Steve-O
by Darth Sillious
by SuperstormTrooper
by jeedai
by Elbereth
by Jecht
by http://mike.now.nu
by dairwen
by ~Becky~
by aredhel
by Psygote
by aredhel
by Dutchwedge
by *waves hand* you will post my caption
by Jedi Bendu
by PPawn
by elbereth
by I'm Sorry.
by starwars_is_really_boring_lotr_is_better
by DeAtH-PaINs
by Jedi Wannabe
by Long-Gone Jinn
by Shaxpere
by Red 5
by Red 5
by Red 5
by Doe's it matter who submitted it?
by Panicin' Skywalker
by Ryan W
by Ryan W
by Ryan W
by Ryan W
by haun solo
by haun solo
by haun solo
by Brian
by Desperado
by Pirate Perian
by Donnie
by Donnie
by Randykin
by Randykin
by KRRouse
by Aww, don't be a baby! Just gimme a hug!
by NO! NO PETS IN OUR DORM!
by THE GREAT KRYSTOFF
by Ashley
by Jedi_Master_Allya
by jenarwen
by Countess
by Jon Truzinski
by Anakin Fiired
by Petunia
by Grafix
by Grafix
by Grafix
by Peter Tutham
by Peter Tutham
by crazy jedi
by jedi cartman
by Max Siemers
by Leleio
by Kenya Starflight
by Pyro Sith
by /shrug
by Master Aero
by legolas'girl
by
by Aaron
by DarthApplesuace
by UnknownWarrior33
by UnknownWarrior33
by Petunia
by bob
by Petunia
by Petunia
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by Tro-Ensha
by wano
by darth_bob
by BIG DEE
by
by No1uno
by SW-2021
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by Dengar 69
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by Kyber
by Dengar 69
by Dengar 69
by goongsta
by BruceSpringsteen
by Conan_the_Barbituate
by guthrie
by guthrie
by Ben Goodman
by guthrie
by Andy the Mad, Wild, and Generally Insane
by Andy the Mad, Wild, and Generally Insane
by Andy the Mad, Wild, and Generally Insane
by Jedi Roge Star
by Lifeling
by T-MACK
by Android17
by Darth Bagel
by T-Burns
by JL Solano
by jedi pete
by Darth Rob
by Chad Linn
by
by
by JForce
by Oak
by bob
by Dav Corwenna
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jeff GoodSmith
by zukman
by Alexis
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by Bill Johnson
by Joel Fat
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by Jar Jar Bites
by Derik Millstead
by D@RK D@RTH V@DER
by D@RK D@RTH V@DER
by Darth Skippy
by Jeremy Kohrs
by BLAH :)
by Duff Man
by Panicin' Skywalker
by The Great Canadian Jedi.
by Grafix
by Jedi-pold
by RU ARTOO?
by Darth Starkiller
by Darth Starkiller
by IG88
by Jango Fett
by the slightly beige side of the Force
by Proffgoth
by JediGean
by Anakinos
by JediGean
by *waves hand* you will post my caption
by Ben's Droid
by Long-Gone Jinn
by JediGean
by JediGean
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Kenya Starflight
by Ben's Droid
by starwarsman77
by Emperoress Palpatine
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Iwishiwasajedi
by grob
by Lighthammer72
by Lily Fantome, the Menace
by Lily Fantome, the Menace
by Darq Vemakks
by Venom
by Venom
by Venom
by jedicop
by Wowbagger
by bexter
by Darthhoss
by Darth Strip Maul
by Master Aero
by lantern
by BruteForce411
by Nightmair of yavin
by rocky hanes
by Darth Hack
by Darth Hack
by Darth Hack
by Darth Hack
by Keith
by Darth Hack
by Keith
by Keith
by Keith
by Darth Dragonus
by snowdog83
by snowdog83
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by Colton .45
by King Namtar
by Susevfi
by CrranHorn
by Spot
by RU ARTOO?
by Darth Starkiller
by Darth Starkiller
by Chris Seavor
by Chris Seavor
by lightsabre lollys! yay! :licks:frazzle:
by DracP
by Calgon Gin Rummy
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jedi Fett
by Maylin
by SirNi
by SirNi
by Ben S. Gaulk
by HERNALDO
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Hmmm...that was kind of sick, huh?
by Hmmmmm...that was better.
by Well, sick is still funny.
by I didn't mean for this to be a chain.
by I didn't mean for this to be a chain.
by *waves hand* you will post my caption
by *waves hand* you will post my caption
by *waves hand* you will post my submission
by Darthhoss
by Thurston McQ
by Nino Fett
by Aragorn's Babe
by Wait. That's not funny...
by Trev
by Lord Sillious
by John Merbler
by bfwhc
by Jay
by Zifnab
by Wytie 2 Brytie
by Wytie 2 Brytie
by Wytie 2 Brytie
by Jenny wica
by Chewie Goodtimes
by Kicks Arse
by Yoda Soup
by Jaro Warren
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Netgerm
by padwans_in_pink
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Long-Gone Jinn
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by padwans_in_pink
by Long-Gone Jinn
by Jedi Master Warren
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Ben's Droid
by Jefferey Caesar
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by cow fool!
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by Darth Buckeye
by DarthApplesauce
by grob
by Christopher Folan
by what do you mean there's no update??!?!?
by dan
by Austin texis again
by Venom
by walking carpet
by Obi-Wan Brandini
by Kenad
by Jaro Warren
by Darth Balky
by Rei Tenjou
by Rei Tenjou
by Jared 'Ewokspy' Streger
by Jon H
by Wookieman9
by Dan Brown
by FalconMechanic
by JediKnight754
by Grando Calrissian
by JediMouse
by Afrika Corpse
by Afrika Corpse
by Willbur the Lobster
by Willbur the Lobster
by K3po
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by Jedi Joel
by Jedi Joel
by Reckless
by Jedi Joel
by T-Burns
by iloovechewie
by Padawan528
by T. Burke
by Markus
by
by DarthStudious
by Josh
by Darth Walker
by Monkey2ewok (Big Fan of The Forumla!)
by Monkey2ewok (Big Fan of the Formula!)
by Brandon
by Brando Calrissian
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by TheLegendaryChosenOne
by By evilgeorge
by yoda#2
by crazeegeorge
by Tank
by Evil the Cat
by princess chewie
by Ben's Droid
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Jar Jar Sucks
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by edwardo
by
by Panicin' Skywalker
by Meet Death
by sfgsfg
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by overworked stalker
by Z
by Mobius 1
by Keith
by Silvius
by obi-wan konoli
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Jeff GoodSmith
by darth drekken
by darth drekken
by darth drekken
by darth drekken
by darth drekken
by Schetch
by Darth Hidious
by The One Armed Bantha
by Darth JMU Bound
by Darth JMU Bound
by Lily Fantome, the Menace
by Lily Fantome, the Majestic Menace
by Venom
by Venom
by Captain Cancer
by Kami
by
by Kyle
by Daniel Laird aka Rogue
by rancortooth
by www.geocities.com/nordiskstagefight/
by attackrat
by Ravenclaw
by Mirasha D'ukal
by Mirasha D'ukal
by Grandadmiral Thrawn
by T-Burns
by Spot
by Darth Crow
by Dark Lord of the Taco
by jedi gal
by Danny
by SirNi
by Iwishiwasajedi
by Iwishiwasajedi
by Darth Hack
by Adam Keen
by Tom Bombadil
by lordoftheringsfan
by lordoftheringsfan
by lordoftheringsfan
by Panicin' Skywalker
by fifa man
by Mark Rosenthal
by Mark Rosenthal
by Qui-Dal Jinn
by miniyou
by Steve Seitz
by Jedi Master Warren
by Darth Tim (the most evil sith lord)
by Marko
by Qui-Gon Kenobi
by Nobody Important
by
by Qui-Gon Tom
by Qui Gregg
by ObiWartKenobi
by
by Darth me
by Darth me
by jordan
by jordan
by jordan
by Daniel McFadin
by DarthAndy1138
by Glen Patterson
by Haun Solo
by Darth Spankyko
by Happo Fett
by Sticks
by Haun Solo
by padme_amidala_19
by Obi-Bozo
by Darth Pain!
by The One-Armed Bantha
by
by saberwolf
by The Senator\
by The Senator
by Chew-Tobbaco
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Kevin "Uncle Kettch" Ray
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Emperoress Palpatine
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Poore
by Poore
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by marajay
by comic book guy
by comic book guy
by comic book guy
by cow fool!
by Princess1
by Grand_Moff_Josh
by Ntobin99
by Bib Fortuna, Twi'lek
by Krapitino
by
by Qui-Gon Kenobi
by Qui-Gon Kenobi
by Qui-Gon Kenobi
by Finger Puller
by grob
by Cirrocco
by OJ SIMPSON
by Nearly as good as Fett
by Long-Gon Jinn
by Beeblebrox
by snowdog83
by df
by Mirasha D'ukal
by df
by Drew Barker
by Bowman Gavin
by Bowman Gavin
by Bowman Gavin
by Bowman Gavin
by Bowman Gavin
by
by Bowman Gavin
by darth saul
by Darth Yapper
by Darth Tico
by Cable77
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by Logan
by Nevertobe Posted
by Darth Paul
by Yarniee
by Miriax
by Miriax
by Miriax
by Miriax
by Miriax
by JAdams
by qwerf
by luke armstrong
by Jedi Master Lou
by Chase Peterson
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Darth Tuna Fish
by qwerf
by Darth Pain!
by Blah :)
by Nobody Important
by Darthjpjeffycoolguy007
by Keith
by Hapoo Fett
by Hapoo Fett
by Hapoo Fett
by DarthJohn
by ArabianShark
by Sean Kack
by Darth Pain!
by Max
by Max
by Darth Pain!
by Obi-Fan Kenobi
by Jeff GoodSmith
by Darth gamer
by Darth Persian Rug Salesman
by rancortooth
by RU ARTOO?
by RU ARTOO?
by TrekingJedi69
by TrekingJedi69
by Nosferatu Asher
by Emperoress Palpatine
by IonFizzle
by BMF
by BMF
by Boba's Only Homie
by Darth Raptor
by New Age Raven
by Docking Bay 94
by Darth Shmarth
by darth red nose
by Blue 5
by Anakin Landwalker
by Jaro Warren
by beckers
by beckers
by beckers
by Gamingboy
by
by Jeremiah Baker
by ThePodSquad
by rogueforce1
by walking carpet
by darth nader
by wookwoman
by No honestly he didnt do a bad highlight
by BuYaSqUiRrEl
by Shadow_Angel
by Sabie Wan Kenobi
by Krissie Wan Baggins
by marajay
by H. Delgado
by doggans
by heaven
by paddy
by Zinger.
by Halo Bender
by beckers
by beckers
by beckers
by Ben S. Gaulk
by shaft
by Janson's Funny Twin
by Janson's Funny Twin
by Jemm
by Kyber
by jedich
by rebel scum
by Kaurrie Solo
by Whoopser2
by RedneckJedi
by RedneckJedi
by Aragorn's Babe
by matty boz
by Mara Jinn
by Mara Jinn
by MrJedi
by Thurston McQ
by Obi-Dude
by Kyia Kenobi
by Murlu
by Murlu
by Jasmerrin
by Homer J. Plagiarist
by Jelp
by Strong Rad
by JadedFire
by Concerned Fan
by jedi336
by Ric
by darth2cellfones
by Bob maloogaloogaloogalooga, 4 looga!
by Rikothereaper
by Nobody Important
by Gidman
by Ryan Sullivan
by Ryan Sullivan
by Jango Fatt
by z00t
by Grand Admiral Kettch
by Padawan Drew
by snowdog83
by Forgotten Silver, Esquire
by hairy gonzales
by Darth Huntington
by Darth Huntington
by clairibela
by Ron Baggins
by snowdog83
by Sparticus
by Sparticus
by Mark Rosenthal
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by T-Burns
by Tom Bombadil
by chris
by chris
by MangoFatt
by Turin Turambar
by Turin Turambar
by Gumpy
by Joebiwan kenobi
by good
by Lando Lackie
by Lando Lackie
by Lando Lackie
by Randall Flagg
by austintexis
by Gray_Leader
by long lost idiot
by JonnieB
by Anonymous
by Ceris Freeport
by corillian princess
by Rin, Destroyer of Keyboards
by corillian princess
by Karl Mamer
by KeiCha Bopar
by Eubie Dumm
by Jumanji
by Bri
by Ta'a Chume
by Darth Sillious
by beckers
by beckers
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by Sith Lord Moore
by Little Jedi
by The Master Jedi Tailor
by Kenya Starflight
by Inebriated Wyrm
by Inebriated Wyrm
by Inebriated Wyrm
by Emperoress Palpatine
by Emperoress Palpatine
by Emperoress Palpatine
by Darth Hellraiser
by grob
by Jada Marnew
by Gary T
by dan 'o' destruction
by
by bantha master
by Tim C.
by Mrs. Vader
by Mrs. Vader
by Rogue_0009
by IonFizzle
by Nevertobe Posted
by Jedi Master Warren
by novi-wan kenobi
by Obi-Wan Brandini
by T-Burns
by Rogue_0009
by Smokey the Nrcoleptic Arsonist
by Amythest
by Grand Admiral Jaxx
by good
by Nevertobe Posted
by HERNALDO
by Hey, I thaught that the TF.
by Dutchwedge
by Dutchwedge
by Dutchwedge
by rancortooth
by Angel 17
by Jada Marnew
by Evil the Cat
by Evil the Cat
by Hapoo Fett
by Brandon Mike
by darth grumpy
by Dean Martin
by jeedai
by Skaiwalkuh
by Blah :)
by Jeff GoodSmith
by BigMikeG
by Darth Starkiller
by Deebs
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Ben S. Gaulk
by Var Zol
by yoda14me
by the Jedi Princess
by force_flow2002
by Je-Larr Deo
by chnyst
by legolas'girl
by kelsith
by sigh...